


Whelp With Potential

by Ravxnclaw



Series: Kyrah in Skyrim [1]
Category: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bro!Farkas, Companions, Confusion, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Fluffy Ending, Jorrvaskr, Multiple Relationships, Nerd!Vilkas, Riften, Smut, Thieves Guild, Vilkas vs Brynjolf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-26
Updated: 2015-11-04
Packaged: 2018-04-28 07:56:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 25,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5084035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravxnclaw/pseuds/Ravxnclaw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vilkas is taken with the newest whelp to join their ranks, but what happens when there's shadow lurking in the corners of Jorrvaskr? Will she stay with the mysterious Brynjolf, or fall for the smart Vilkas?</p><p>Mostly from Vilkas/Dovahkiin POV's, possibly some Brynjolf later. </p><p>I do not own Skyrim, Whiterun, Vilkas, Brynjolf, Farkas, the Companions, the Thieves Guild, or anything other than my original character. All credit goes to Bethesda!</p><p> </p><p>  <b> Possible spoilers for Thieves Guild/Companions questlines. Read at your own discretion </b></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Vilkas POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Vilkas, Farkas, Jorrvaskr, the Companions, Whiterun, or anything other than my original character, all credit goes to Bethesda

My mouth went dry when I first saw her, and instantly I knew that I had to get her as a Companion. She walked into Jorrvaskr so surely in some type of armor that I had never seen before, her eyes scanning every corner of the building to search for threats. She was aware of her surroundings and took everything in, her eyes never staying in one place.  
Aela approached her and jealousy seized me at not being the first to talk to her. I took a seat near them and heart Aela telling her where to find Kodlak and that he was the one to talk to. I felt her eyes land on me as she walked past, her gaze meeting mine until she turned her back to me. She walked with such purpose, such confidence, that it was hard not to watch her walk. The leather barely made a sound as she made her way down the stairs, making me wonder for the first of many times where she had been before she came to us.  
“What do you think about the whelps this year?” Aela took the seat next to me, draping her arm over the back of the chair. She tilted an eyebrow up to me and I saw her smirk through the paint that always resided on her face.  
“Some look capable, some might not even make it to their Trial.”  
It wasn’t wrong. A few of the recruits looked like they had already handled themselves in battle, but some of them were obviously in it for the glory of being a Companion. I could see it in their eyes, the clear hopefulness of someone who had never bloodied their sword and the haunted expression of those who had seen their comrades fall and were able to handle the stress of combat.  
“What about this last one?”  
Aela watched my face, surely trying to gauge my reaction. Clearly she had seen me eyeing the girl as she walked in, but I wasn’t about to let the most miniscule amount of attraction defer my attention from the Companions.  
“The way she walked seemed like someone who’s seen their fair share of fights, and her arm wasn’t shaking even though she was still holding her sword. She might make it through.”  
I heard voices rising from the other side of the room, Farkas nodding his head at me as he looked back at her, the newest whelp. Aela may have seen my eyes trailing after her, but Farkas knew me better than anyone. It appears that he had seen her and thought of me, both embarrassing and worrying me. While we may be brothers, Farkas possessed all of the muscle build that I lacked, and had long ago become known for making the ladies swoon.  
He walked toward me, one of the female recruits that had showed up a few weeks previously blatantly watching him. She may have had the combat abilities to be a Companion, but she was so easy read it was doubtful. I had long ago stopped learning the names of the whelps since most of them ended up being kicked out or unable to complete their Trials.  
“Brother,” he greeted me, falling into the chair beside Aela, “care to make any wagers on this year’s whelps?”  
I shrugged, my eyes still watching her as she walked back to rejoin the others. She still had her hood up and I was doing all I could to see through the shadows, but they seemed to cling to her unlike anyone else in the room. Her eyes were all that stood out from the shadows, scanning the room once more, my heart racing whenever they stopped on me. It was just a brief moment, but it made my blood rush all the same.  
“Maybe after they’ve all been put to the test, I want to see what they’re made of first.”  
I saw him nod as he usually did when he didn’t have anything else to say. We watched as Kodlak entered the room, volunteering me to test the new recruits without consulting me first. I heard Aela snigger at the look of shock on my face. I wasn’t ready for a fight; I’d already had quite a bit to drink and wasn’t ready to fight this early in the day.  
“Come on, then.” I saw Farkas’s hand slip a coin into Aela’s as we walked out to the yard, flashing a smile to the Redguard whelp before he walked out the door. I waited as the others followed, finally exiting with her right in front of me.  
The shadows hugged her as if attracted to her, the dark color of her armor only adding to the mystery she was shrouded in. Her light skin was only visible around her eyes and her hands, her thin fingers brushing lightly against the armor covering her thighs. I watched as she crossed her arms, back to the wall, keeping her eyes on everyone else.  
“You, new girl. You’re up first.”  
She walked toward me without saying a word, the sunlight reflecting minimally off her hood. I steadied the shield on my arm, my heart racing in anticipation, wanting so badly to see how she fought. I had seen her holding a sword of some sort, but wasn’t able to tell what it was from afar. The handle was gold and delicate, making me believe that it was elven.  
“You ready, whelp?” My voice sounded harsh to my own ears and I saw her lift her hand up. Her fingers wrapped around the cowl that had hidden her face from me and pulled it off. I felt frozen as I watched a waterfall of black cascade down her back, the ends curling gracefully against the harsh armor.  
Her dark eyes watched me as she withdrew her sword, a wispy cloud of fog surrounding it, clearly magical. She raised one eyebrow at me, stepping toward me, watching me the entire time.  
“We don’t use magic in the Companions.” I warned her quickly upon recognizing the hum of magic in the air, unsure of what that weapon would do to me even during this test. She sheathed the sword once more, the hum disappearing from the air around us, and I tossed her one of the swords from my side.  
“Here, use mine.”  
With wide eyes she walked toward me, my sword still rough from the last job I went on. Her fingers were wrapped so wonderfully around the hilt of the sword it was difficult to keep from staring at them. Her footsteps were practically nonexistent on the stones of the training yard as she stalked closer to me, eyes searching for any weaknesses in my shield.  
Strike after strike she landed on the shield, the sounds ringing around us. I could feel the strength in her arm in the blows she landed, and could see the training in the way she held her body. Her legs kept her steady and moving toward me, fire burning in the depths of her dark eyes.  
“Nice job, whelp. You’ve got quite an arm on you, there.”  
She extended the hilt of the sword back to me, her body relaxing once more from her battle stance. The leather wrapped around the hilt was still warm from her hand, my heart racing when I felt the heat that so clearly came from her body. Her hands raised above her head to pull her hair away from her face, the lovely loose curls resting against her shoulder. She looked so beautiful then, her face flushed from the fight, nothing interrupting my view of her face.  
“Thank you.”  
Her voice was gentle and hard to hear above the wind beating against the city wall and the murmuring voices of the Circle. She smiled at me then for the very first time, and I think that it was the first time I was sure I was in love to her. Her smile was so slight and so easy that it looked natural on her face, and I knew that I would do anything to make it happen again.  
She walked back up the steps with her hood in hand, hair flowing lightly in the breeze. The dark curls danced in the wind, brushing against the sharp angle of her cheekbone and I was sure my eyes would be permanently stuck on her. I didn’t want to miss a moment of her, everything about her vastly different from any of the women in Whiterun. All of the women from town were invested in family politics and the societal norms, but she broke all of them.  
“What do you think about the new girl?” Kodlak’s voice interrupted my thoughts, my face reddening rapidly.  
“She’s strong, and knows how to wield a weapon. I think she could be valuable in our ranks.” _Also, I don’t want to see her walk out of here._  
“I thought so too, she really held her own up against you.” He nodded then, walking away from me and returning inside Jorrvaskr. She looked at me then with the most piercing gaze, her hands resting daintily on her hips. She smiled then as she turned, making her way back inside.  
Upon entering I saw Farkas leading the whelps down to the living quarters, my heart sinking at the thought of him being the person to introduce her to her bed. I followed behind them, his voice echoing through the halls of the living quarters as he reminded them that it doesn’t matter who sleeps in which bed, there is no claims to property for them yet. I saw her sit down on the bed farthest from the door, the shadows once more claiming her as their own.  
“What do you think now, brother?” Farkas clapped me on the shoulder as we walked down the hall, the torches lighting our way.  
“Good group this year, I definitely see some potential.” He nodded, his hand sliding from my shoulder. I had seen some potential, especially in the newest girl, potential to become the first person to hold their own in a fight against me. Potential to be the first person to beat me in years. Potential to be the person who made my heart race and my palms sweaty. Yes, she had potential, but it wasn’t just on the battlefield. 

Later that night, I awoke to the slightest hint of a creak in the hallway. Usually I was able to sleep during the night, the unusual sound setting me on alert. Most of the time I was able to tell who was walking around during the night due to the heaviness of the footsteps, but these were new to my ears. They were light and sweeping as if the owner was trying to move without being detected, only serving to heighten my sense of urgency.  
I threw the blanket off of my body, struggling to open the door to my quarters without making any sound. I snuck out into the hallway, the dimmed torches providing the least amount of light possible. Panic gripped me tightly upon seeing a figure stirring in the shadows, creeping toward the living quarters Farkas had put the whelps in just earlier that day. It slipped around the corner and I hurried toward it, my eyes sweeping to find any type of weapon.  
I poked my head around the corner of the doorway, my eyes instantly finding her through the darkness that had overtaken the room. The light of the torches barely reached through the doorway and I took one step in, searching for any hint of who would want to sneak up on the whelps.  
“Shh, lass. I think I heard someone else in the hallway.”  
The voice sets me on edge, the foreign sound and accent one that I had never heard before. I heard the smallest hint of a laugh then, and I could tell that it was coming from the back of the room. My heart dropped when I realized that it was coming from her bed.  
“Sorry, it’s just so odd to have you here.”  
“I won’t be here long, just couldn’t pass up the chance.”  
Their voices were hushed and I saw the blanket moving, taking a step into the room. I saw her smile flash through the torchlight, but it was different from the one she had given me earlier. This was full and wide, obvious attraction on her face. I could hear bodies moving in her bed and stood up straight, jealousy burning in my chest. Who was he? He’s obviously not a Companion, so how did he get into Jorrvaskr?  
“Who are you?”  
My voice cut right through the quiet that hung in the air, their voices and quiet laughs immediately stopping. My face burned with anger at this intruder and I pushed the door open, flooding the room with light.  
Her face was a mixture of anger and shock, eyes wide and glaring at me. I focused on the stranger who had invaded my home and her bed, his easy position resting so close to her only fueling my immediate anger at him. I didn’t know who she had been before she had decided to join the Companions and I hadn’t been brave enough to ask; maybe this man was her husband, and she was only staying in the whelps’ quarters to show her dedication.  
He stood then, his frame as wide and bulky as Farkas, but his eyes much sharper. His eyes met mine and he smiled easily, one reddish brow quirking up just as hers had earlier upon looking at me. They must know each other, their mannerisms were so similar.  
“Name’s Brynjolf, just came by to make sure you Companions were taking care of our little lass here.” He looked back at her and muttered something under his breath, so low that I couldn’t hear it, but it made her smile all the same. “I’m sure that I’ll see you soon.”  
With that, he walked briskly down the hallway and up the stairs, his stride so sure of himself that it’s clear he’s a thief. His footsteps were impossibly light for a man of his size, my mind instantly questioning how high his thievery went, possibly all the way to Riften’s infamous Thieves Guild. If he was affiliated with the Thieves Guild, what was he doing with the newest whelp? She couldn’t be connected with something so sinister if she was wanting to join the ranks of the Companions.  
Looking back at her, I saw the look in her eyes, and knew that it was more than a business connection. Her dreamy smile and the pain in her eyes said it all, and I could feel all of my hopes with her dash away. She watched after him and didn’t even grace me with a glance, that jealous feeling eating away at my mind once more.  
I decided then that I was going to get her to distance herself from a thief like that Brynjolf. I knew that if she could become disconnected from him, she would no longer feel drawn to the life of crime he surely led. If only she would look at me the way she looked at him.


	2. Kyrah POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyrah contemplates the men in her life and her future with the Companions, and attempts to patch things up with Vilkas 
> 
>  
> 
> ****Please let me know if you have any preference of Brynjolf vs. Vilkas for the end of this story****

Watching him walk away made me instantly regret my decision to join the Companions. The Guild would always be the place I considered home and he was the first man to take my heart, but the Companions were the place for me to be. He had a smile on his face and his voice was mocking, but it was only to get a rise out of Vlikas. His voice was low when he told me that he’d miss me, but I could still hear the hurt behind his words. I had been tempted to stay in Riften and I knew that it wouldn’t be an issue with him, running the Guild and eventually staying with Brynjolf, but it just wasn’t feasible.   
After finding out this business of my being ‘the Dragonborn’, I’d never felt closer to Skyrim before. I had the ability to help all of these people, and thievery wasn’t going to help hone the skills I would need in order to fight a dragon. Leaving him had been among the hardest things I’d ever had to do and I could feel his eyes on me as I walked away from Riften. He had known from the beginning that I belonged in the Guild, and felt that by leaving town I was abandoning him and the Guild we had rebuilt together.   
This new stranger, Vilkas, stood in the room, his chest rising and falling rapidly. He wasn’t as built as his brother who had showed me to my bed, but Farkas had openly told me about how smart Vilkas was. I could see his eyes glaring in the direction Brynjolf had left in, likely angry about the intrusion of the Guild in the place he considered home. He looked at me, his gaze softening some from the evident anger, eyes meeting mine.   
He made my stomach squirm, his eyes watching me while I didn’t have his armor to protect me. His eyes moved lower and I flushed at the thought of him seeing my skin, despite the rough clothes that I kept on my body in case of late night interruptions. His lean muscle was obvious even through his bulky armor and I couldn’t help looking at him, comparing him to Brynjolf. I had always imagined my life with him, eventually extending the Guild’s influence throughout the Reach, possibly someday seeing him in the Temple of Mara. But the dragon in West Watchtower changed everything, making it impossible for me to live out my life in Riften.   
“Need anything else, whelp?” His voice was much harsher than when he had complimented my skills after our short fight, eyes burning as he met my gaze once more. I shook my head, not trusting myself to speak for fear of my disappointment seeping through. He nodded once and turned on his heel, closing the door that he had recently thrown open.   
“My name is Kyrah, by the way.” He paused for the shortest moment, his eyes never straying from the hallway and his room that must be farther down.   
“We’ll see, whelp.”   
His denial of my name was clearly a way of keeping himself distant from the new recruits, his use of whelp meant to be a reminder that we were not yet Companions. He walked away from me, his footsteps much heavier than Brynjolf’s. His entrance had shocked me; he had been so quiet and seemingly introverted when I first arrived, but apparently he could be roused if someone other than a Companion entered Jorrvaskr.  
“Can you try to keep it down from now on? I don’t think you’re supposed to be receiving visitors here, either.”   
I curled back into my embarrassment, allowing the shadows of Nocturnal to claim me once more. Vilkas was obviously very important in the ranks of the Companions, and I’ve already given him a horrible first impression of me. I should have asked him to stay away, but his appearance was one that I never would have expected. He never strayed from Riften for anything other than a necessary job, meaning that I was likely on his route home.   
No matter where life took me, I had always envisioned myself somehow ending up with Brynjolf at my side. He’d long been known for being quite the womanizer throughout town, and I was just realizing that I may have been nothing more than another one of his conquests. I had felt that he saw me as something more than a one night stand, thought for the briefest of moments that someday he might love me. At that moment, though, it was the first time I’d realized that he might not have felt the same way about me.   
Tears stung in my eyes and I tried to keep quiet, my sniffles the only thing that broke through the silence that had once more settled over the living quarters. My fellow recruits snored and wheezed around me, each of them peacefully asleep while I sat awake, worrying over nothing more than a man. He had stolen my heart when all he had wanted was a kiss, and I was naive enough to fall for it.   
“Vilkas?” My voice was nothing more than a whisper, each fiber of my being hoping that he’s no longer within range to hear me, but fearing that his image of me was only going to get worse. When he didn’t answer I knew that he had returned to his bed, giving me all the permission I needed to do what I needed to do.   
I pulled on my boots, wrapping a thin layer of armor around myself before I crept out of the room. Throwing glances either way I appeased my inner urge to wander, craving the bite of the early morning air and the comfort of an empty road. I hurried up the stairs and through Jorrvaskr’s main floor, using all of my skills to keep from waking anyone else on my first night.  
Relief flooded through my body, filling up my heart at the familiar crispness of the moonlit air. I sucked in a breath as I made my way down the front steps, tying up my Thieves Guild armor as I worked my way through town. I knew that the armor wasn’t going to protect me in the event of a dragon attack, but it made me feel at home. I missed my bed and my friends, and mostly I missed the delusional thought that I was going to be with Brynjolf someday. I missed the idea that I had lived with in my head and his smile. I missed feeling at home somewhere and not being a whelp. I missed just hours earlier, when I hadn’t made such a horrible impression on one of the people who may decide whether I was allowed to join the ranks of the Companions.   
“What are you doing out so late, elf?” The guard’s voice interrupted my thoughts, grounding me once more in reality. I had wandered through Whiterun without knowing it, making my way close to the Shrine of Talos that was unusually silent without the priest there to deliver the message of Talos.   
I shrugged off the guard’s clearly judgmental words, slowly making my way through the winding path past houses and the Temple of Kynareth. I knew that stepping in was supposed to make me feel better, but I didn’t think that anything could help with the sense of hopelessness. Since I had lost the image that I had often followed, the image of myself and Brynjolf at the head of the Guild, it felt that I had been tossed into a dark pit and wasn’t sure if there was a bottom. I was flailing, searching for anything to grasp onto, needing a new direction to take my life in.   
I was going to have to make up my bad behavior to Vilkas, somehow convince him of my dedication to the Companions and try to hide my association with the Thieves Guild. By no means was I ashamed of the Guild, but it was the polar opposite of the Companions, and acknowledging that I was their Guild Master would only serve to get me kicked out of Jorrvaskr.   
I wandered for the rest of the night, still walking the same shape around the edge of Whiterun when the sun began to peek through the thin clouds that had hidden the stars from me for the last hour. It was a welcome sight and I allowed it to wash over me, deciding that it was time for me to clean up my act in front of the Companions and show them that I meant business. I had seen the other whelps and knew that I stood more of a chance than most of them, as some of the boys had clearly come from a privileged family and were joining for nothing more than the status. I had witnessed their innocence firsthand, watching their clumsiness through a fight with Vilkas as they were used to blunted swords and an opponent who worked for their family. They weren’t ready for combat, already giving me an upper hand on most of the younger recruits.   
During the first tests, I had also seen the strength that Vilkas carried within himself. He surely wasn’t as big as Farkas, but his eyes were pools of wisdom behind the paint that surrounded them, and the set of his mouth was a clear symbol that although he had a lot he could say, he often kept quiet. His jaw stayed taunt both on and off the training field, showing me his determination. He had protected his home from an intruder, despite the fact that he wasn’t a threat to anyone other than a few coin purses, without any type of weapon strapped to his body.  
The doors of Jorrvaskr appeared before me and I pushed them open, taking in one last breath of fresh air before I made my way inside. The hall opened up in front of me and I glanced around, sending a smile toward the already nice Aela before finding him. He had placed himself far into the shadows of the hall and I could see his eyes moving, stopping when they met mine. I knew that I had to make a better impression with him and walked toward him, trying to focus all of my attention on making him like me.   
I sat down next to him, lowering my hood to make my point as eloquently as possible, trying to keep my hood from interrupting the conversation I was hoping to happen. He flicked his gaze up lazily to meet mine, his fingers twirling a knife through them without any hint of worry.   
“What’s with all the chatter?”   
“I wanted to apologize for last night.” I kept it straightforward, wanting to let him know that I don’t mess around about serious topics. “I was not expecting anyone to come here looking for me, and I’m sorry.”  
“Don’t mention it.” His tone was clipped and it was clear that he wasn’t interested in carrying on any type of conversation with me, disheartening the confidence that I had spent all night working up. I looked down at my lap before standing up, allowing my fingers to anxiously comb through the end of my hair. He hadn't seemed so cold when we were testing my fighting skills, though last night had probably hardened him against me. He had probably already made up his mind about me, and it wasn't positive.   
I walked away from him, my shoulders much more slumped than they had been before. I had wanted to make him feel better about the idea of my presence in the Companions, but had only made things worse. I couldn’t decide if I wanted to try again, or if it was even worth the risk.   
I knew that he didn’t like me, and I decided that from that moment on I was going to leave him alone. I didn’t need a friend; I had survived out in the wild before, and would be able to make it alone if they chose to let me join their ranks. I decided in that moment to throw all of my attention into working my hardest, wanting to learn as much as I could. I’d leave Vilkas alone, I decided. I was never going to bother him again.


	3. Vilkas POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas tries to work through his thoughts concerning the newest whelp, only ending up more confused than he had been to begin with. 
> 
>  
> 
> ****Opinions of Brynjolf vs. Vilkas are welcome!****

She walked away from me looking resigned, her fingers dancing through the wonderfully curled ends of her hair. I watched her move around the table, her hips swishing back and forth as she walked around the corner of the table and toward the training yard. When she turned I could see her chewing on her lower lip, regretting how rude I had been to her.  
I hadn’t meant to be so curt toward her, but my jealousy had become so evident once she sat down next to me. All that I could picture when I looked at her was her face when she looked at him, the far off look in her eye that said everything that she felt about him without words. He was the one that held her heart, leaving me with no chance of winning her over. When she looked at me, all I was able to think about was the smile on her face when she looked at him compared to the one she had given me; so much wider and with love written on her face, while mine was a simple thanks for a compliment.  
She was the first woman to capture my attention in years, of course she was already spoken for. My mind conjured up images of him touching her skin, him listening to her voice, him helping train her, his arms around her, swinging a sword with her. Her eyes had clearly displayed hurt when she met my gaze, only growing as I gave her the smallest replies possible. I knew that if I spoke to her for too long, my real reason for feeling hurt would emerge, making the situation with her even worse.  
“Wipe your mouth, mate. You’re drooling.”  
Farkas knocked his elbow against me as he sat down at my side, a taunting smile meeting me when I looked at him. He nudged his arm against mine once more and nodded toward her, his eyes thankfully lacking the glint that was there whenever he looked at a new woman he was after.  
“I’m not.” I couldn’t think of anything clever to retort with, instead trying to get him to drop the subject altogether.  
“Come on, you couldn’t be more obvious. Do you even know her name?”  
I nodded, resting my chin in my hand and watched her open the door to the training yard,  
the light hitting the skin of her face in the most flattering way. Her eyes squinted against it and her nose wrinkled, the sunlight of the early morning making her hair sparkle somehow as she drifted through the doorway. I couldn’t keep myself from watching as she walked out, wondering how much of the sparkle that always seemed to surround her was in my mind.  
“Kyrah.”  
Her name sounded like something out of a dream, perfectly fitting since she was beautiful and exotic compared to the women of Whiterun. She was so different, the first Dunmer woman that I had encountered in years. I looked back at Farkas, trying to make my expression seem hardened and uncaring but most likely only looking like I was in some sort of intense pain.  
“Been a while for you, hasn’t it.” He didn’t ask me, probably because he already knew the answer. It had been quite a while since a woman had captured my affections the way she already had, and apparently I had made it a little too obvious.  
“I’m not going to do anything, though.” I paused, watching the same surprised expression that I had already expected plaster itself across his face. “She’s a whelp, it would seem like I was going to give her special treatment once it came time for Trial.”  
I crossed my arms, knowing that he wasn’t going to drop the topic. He turned his body in his chair to face me, his brows furrowed together, jaw set as he tried to work out my reasoning behind not acting on my feelings for her.  
“Plus, she already has a man in her life, I saw him last night. Trust me, she’s not interested in me.”  
“What?” He seemed thrown off by that, though he surely must have encountered this problem at least once.  
“He came to see her and I walked in on it. She wouldn’t want to be with me anyway, after I was so rude to her just now.”  
I was still regretting how I had treated her in our last conversation, but there was no way for me to take it back. She had already left and was surely thinking about him once more, already forgetting that she had even talked to me. Farkas looked at me and shrugged his shoulders, leaning back in his chair.  
“Tell her how you feel and hope for the best. I may not be as smart as you, but I know women, and I know that she’s looking at you more than she needs to. And there’s the fact that she voluntarily came up and talked to you, that shows that she at least doesn’t hate you.”  
I considered this for a moment, wondering why I hadn’t thought of that. I had known for quite a while that no matter how intelligent I became I was never going to be able to learn my way to Farkas’s level of expertise with women. He was always going to be stronger than me in this area, as well as physically.  
We both looked around as the door opened and watched her walk in, tossing her damp hair over her shoulder. She briskly made her way down the stairs toward the living quarters, already unlacing her thin brown armor. Despite my denial of my feelings toward her I felt my heart flutter in my chest, feeling an irrational fear that Farkas was going to be able to hear my erratic heartbeat and know the truth that he’s already guessed at.  
“You’ve got it bad, haven’t you.”  
I nodded without thinking, knowing that if anyone could help me with her it would be him. He knew how to woo any type of woman and had used these tools many times, and to have his knowledge at my disposal could prove to be invaluable. I was incredibly lucky that he wasn’t thinking about her the same way I was, or I really wasn’t going to stand a chance against him.  
“Yeah, I do.” He nodded at me, slapping me on the back and standing up.  
“Alright, so here’s what you’re going to do.” I stood up and faced him, silently thanking him for helping me without even having to be asked. “Just pretend that you’re not interested in her at all, but that she’s interested in you and you know it.” He looked at me intensely, as if he had just shared with me the ultimate secret of life.  
“How would that possibly work?”  
“It helps you treat her just like any other woman instead of a woman that you want to impress, as well as making you feel more confident around her. You’ll be able to talk to her again, and it’ll help you forget that she makes your stomach tingle.”  
He smiled confidently, slapping me on the back once more and shoving me in the direction of the staircase. He nodded encouragingly and I made my way down to the living quarters, each step taking me closer to her and making me sweat more. I thought about talking to her, telling her that she made my skin feel tingly and my head spin just by walking into the room, and about how seeing her with another man made me feel like I’d been punched in the stomach. I thought about telling her all that and more, but decided against it because I knew she would reject me.  
I saw her sitting with a book in her hands, her eyes scanning over each word, never straying from the page in front of her. Her lean legs were crossed and I saw the unfamiliar boots on her feet, the rough brown leather far different from the armor usually worn by those from Whiterun. Her foot tapped lightly on the edge of the table, my hands beginning to shake as I made my way toward her.  
She looked up at me and I smiled awkwardly, feeling the pressure of her gaze weighing heavily on me. I could feel my smile slipping into something that more closely resembled a grimace and I took one deep breath, remembering what Farkas had instructed me to do; pretend that I wasn’t interested in her at all. It was difficult to think of her as a person instead of the silent enigma that I had more often encountered, wondering if it was even possible for me to pretend that I wasn’t attracted to her.  
In that moment it was as if I had completely forgotten how to speak, my tongue feeling drier than it ever had before, and as if it had swelled to thrice its usual size. She began to look worried and I was scared that I looked ill, my stomach heaving at the thought of looking so stupid in front of her. All I could think about was the rules of the Companions, every other articulate thought dashed from my mind.  
“Whelps aren’t allowed to just help themselves to the books.”  
_Oh gods, why did I say that?_ I sounded more like a scolding elder than a potential suitor, her polite smile fading from her face. I saw her quickly place the book on the shelf and stand up, brushing her clothes back into place nervously.  
“Oh I’m sorry, it’s just that I was partially through the story and left my own copy back at home.” She placed her hands on her hips once more, trying to keep herself from seeming too submissive in the conversation, but clearly uncomfortable all the same.  
I backed away from her, turning curtly to find Farkas laughing at me from the hallway leading to our bedrooms. He was shaking his head at me and I felt myself turn red, knowing that all I had done was make myself worse in her mind. She must have seen me as someone who was going to reprimand her for doing wrong and keeping her on her toes, when all that I wanted was to curl her toes.  
I shook my head at myself, attempting to clear such thoughts from my mind. She was a recruit, a whelp, nothing more than the others at her level, and I shouldn’t have paid her so much attention over the other whelps. They were all at the same level, though I had only spent time paying attention to her.  
“That looked like a disaster, even from here.”  
“It wasn’t.” I paused, anticipating his eagerness to know. “I just couldn’t think of anything besides the rules here, and told her that she needed to ask before reading the books.”  
He barked out another laugh, his hand resting on my shoulder once again. I knew that he felt bad for me whenever these situations arose, as he was finally good at something mental that I had no skill in. I had known for a long time that he enjoyed being better at something so simple, relishing this every chance he got.  
“Don’t worry, we’ll try something else. At least you’re not busting into their bedroom and demanding to know who her friend was.”  
“How do you know about that?”  
“Ria, the other recruit, has quite a mouth on her.” He winked at that, leading me to believe that he meant more than just gossip, but I wasn’t going to pry. I had learned the hard way that he could be more graphic than anyone else we knew in this sense, feeling no sense of privacy when it concerned his sexual conquests.  
“What do I do now?”  
“Well, you’re a fighter, and from the looks of it, so is she. I saw the way she handled herself out there against you, and I’ve seen you fight. You’re both skilled, maybe try taking her to the training yard, seeing what she can do?” He nodded at these words, looking impressed with himself at knowing what to do in this situation. He was making so much sense I was left wondering why I couldn’t think of what to do other than regurgitating regulations for the living quarters.  
I looked back at her, finding her seat empty, met with only the closing of the door to the whelps’ living quarters. It seemed to slam closed, possibly her way of hinting that she was still angry at me for my outburst the previous night. It had been embarrassing to find her in such a compromising situation so early in my interactions with her, but it had also stolen any budding ideas of the possibility of something more than comradery.  
I made my way upstairs, deciding that I needed to test her skills in combat further to know what she was made of, as well as being near her without making a complete fool of myself. Farkas was right, she had looked most comfortable with a sword in her hands, swinging away at the iron of my shield, and I knew that it was going to be my way into her life. I could introduce her to the Companion style of fighting and try to learn where she learned to fight, trying to get to know her without opening my mouth and making things worse yet again.


	4. Kyrah POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas gives Kyrah some lessons in two-handed weaponry and she likes it much more than she anticipated
> 
> **Smut chapter is coming next, so please let me know if that is something you wouldn't want to read so I can leave it out**

A note on my bed had instructed me to find my way out to the training yard, the handwriting too clean and slanted to be Njada trying to start a fight with me, and I couldn’t think of anyone else who would want to fight me. For a fleeting moment I hoped that it was Brynjolf wanting to meet me, but I knew his handwriting and it was far messier than that before me.  
Making my way toward the yard I keep my eyes sharp, fearing that the note was meant to be an intimidation instead of an invitation. No one even glanced at me, all of their attention drawn to their dinners. I pushed the door open as little as I could, my eyes sweeping the area. A figure stood there, leaning lazily on the handle of the greatsword, and again I considered Brynjolf as the writer of the note.  
Their hair was swept away from their face, though the shadows hid the true color, I wanted to imagine that it was red. Their broad shoulders were tilted from leaning down and the armor was thin, hugging to their reasonably muscled frame. I opened the door further, my stomach stirring as they turned, their body becoming more obvious to me in the dimming light of the evening.  
I walked out, confident that it wasn’t really him but hoping that it was. I could just picture him waiting for me, his lopsided smile there to greet me, his thick arms opening to wrap me in his embrace. I could feel my skin tingling with the thought, trying my hardest to suppress how badly I want it to be him waiting for me.  
“Come on, whelp.” Vilkas’s voice slices through my fantasies, but doesn’t diminish the way my stomach feels like it’s flipped over itself. “Time to work on with two-handed weapons.”  
“I don’t use two-handed.” I took a few steps into the sunlight, squinting to see his hand run through his dark hair. He made me feel like a dumb schoolgirl, wanting to shy away from him, pushing Brynjolf’s denial from my mind.  
“You do now.” He tossed the greatsword my way, turning his back on me. It took all of my strength to keep the sword from falling, feeling foreign and too heavy in my hands. “If you want to join the Companions, you need to know your way around every type of weapon. You never know what’s going to happen.”  
He turned to face me again, his dark eyes piercing mine as I tested the weight of the sword once more. His shield was resting against the wall and he was unarmed, leaving me with no idea as to what he wanted me to do. I wasn’t going to attack him if he was completely unarmed, and the Companions’ distrust of magic made it clear that he wasn’t going to use any type of ward.  
“Come here,” he gestured for me to come closer, “I want you to beat up this dummy before you even try to beat me.” He pointed at the test dummy as I drew closer to him, the tip of the sword dragging across the ground. Two-handed weapons left me without any way of defending myself using magic, and were too long for me to accurately hit my target. I’d never felt comfortable with any of the greatswords and battle hammers that were around me, instead choosing to keep an elven blade by my side.  
I lifted the sword over my shoulder, focusing on the chest of the dummy before swinging with all my might. It felt heavy and unnatural and I knew soon that I had overestimated the size of the sword, the edge barely grazing the burlap exterior of the dummy. I heard him chuckling from beside me, his rough hands landing on top of mine.  
Oh gods, no matter how mean he was to me, his hands were so nice and warm on mine that they made me forget the last man who had touched me. His body pressed against my back and his arms encircled mine, the weight of the sword carried by his muscles instead of mine.  
I could feel his gentle warmth radiating through the thin armor that he now wore, his body so close, only two thin layers of leather separating his skin from mine. I resisted the urge to rest my head back on his chest, never allowing myself to respond to his body, wanting to remain as professional as possible. He was helping my chances of becoming a Companion, teaching me, just as he must have done with all of the other whelps.  
“Now, you need to push with your back arm instead of just swinging with the front arm. Your stance is a little tight,” I felt his feet nudging mine apart, my face reddening and my eyes closing for a moment. “Now, put all of your weight on your back foot, and push it forward with your swing.”  
I pushed forward like he said, his body working to keep mine in the correct position, my thigh coming to rest on his. He felt so sturdy and strong, the heat of his leg meeting mine through our armor, and I couldn’t help it. I allowed my fingers to linger on his before gripping his hand over the sword, my back curving to match the contours of his body. It felt so solid and real, unlike any of the thoughts that Brynjolf had left me with. Vilkas was here with me and although he didn’t know it, his lesson was helping me learn something other than how to properly handle a two-handed weapon. He felt so real, so present here with me, so much warmer than the lonely fantasies that warmed me through the lonely nights.  
He groaned for a moment and my eyes slipped open, realizing that we hadn’t moved for the last few minutes. He was probably uncomfortable with the situation and I shied away from him, trying to squeeze past him into the open area of the yard. I brushed against him and felt something poke me in the back, jerking away quickly.  
I whirled around to look at him, wondering what had just hit the back of my body. Maybe he didn’t want me as a Companion, and it was some type of weapon meant to keep me from embarrassing the ranks further after the first night. His eyes met mine and he took a few steps back, sheathing his sword on his hip.  
“We will continue this lesson in a moment,” he gave me no further explanation, hurrying back into Jorrvaskr, leaving me with an empty training yard and a mind full of questions.  
I took a seat at one of the tables, unrolling an empty scroll of paper, withdrawing a thin piece of charcoal that had seen me through many letters to employers. I wrote his name first, feeling my heart flip at the thought of speaking with him. He had made it obvious that he wasn’t any more interested in me than his other conquests, but I still had the lingering thought that if I had stayed in Riften, we would have stood a chance.  
_Brynjolf -_  
I have known for a long time that there was no hope of you and I being together, but I’ve finally decided to let you go. For months you have haunted my dreams, but I’ve come to realize that you will never want me the way I want you. I will return to the Guild someday, and hope that you will still be my adviser and friend.  
  
I folded the letter into the pocket of my armor, the door opening, for some reason not wanting Vilkas to think that I had any further correspondence with Brynjolf. I heard him draw the sword from its sheath once more and I lept up, jumping at the thought of having his arms wrapped around me once more. He looked more comfortable than when he had run out of the yard, his face once again the cold mask that I was usually met with.  
I stood in front of him, pulling my hair over my shoulder to keep it out of my way, waiting for him to place the sword in my hands once more. I felt the hint of his body brush against my back and a shiver ran down my spine, his hands holding mine once more.  
“Your grip is off, you’re too used to one-handed weapons.” He wrapped my hands around the hilt of the sword and tightened my thumbs, moving my hands until they were in a position completely foreign to me. “Here, keep your hands like this, and widen your stance, and you’re good.”  
I could hardly hear his voice through the haze that I was in. His body was pressed to mine and he left me dizzy, making me feel more fulfilled than my thoughts of Brynjolf ever had. He was really here, and although he wasn’t interested in me, it felt so good to have someone near me in real life I let myself fall into it.  
His arms held me up and I willed him to not move, wanting to keep the lesson from ending. It felt so good to have him pressed to me after so many nights left gripping my pillow to my chest, his breath on my neck making my head spin.  
Even though I didn’t like using two-handed weapons in any type of combat, I knew that I was going to enjoy the lessons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am currently leaning toward Vilkas, but opinions are more than welcome!


	5. Vilkas POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas has trouble containing himself during the lessons he's giving Kyrah, possible leading to something more 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> **Part 1 of 2 of smut chapters, please do not read if you are uncomfortable with sexual content!!**

By Dibella, I never imagined that she was going to do that. Her body was pressed to mine and the beast that resided within me threatened to overtake me. My blood was pumping in my ears and I could feel it rushing further south, the beast already triumphing over the man then and there.  
Jorrvaskr flashed before me as I stumbled my way to my quarters, holding back the beast for as long as I could. I could smell her on me, the smell of lavender and mountain flower and her skin that clung to me from her touch, something dirtier marring the purity of it, but still making me feel far more drunk than any type of ale I’d ever tried. I could feel her body’s curves and the way they felt wrapped in my arms, so small but bringing about such a large influence. I crashed into my bedroom, slamming the door behind me, her image still imprinted on my brain.  
I allowed for her to fill my mind as I yanked my trousers down to my ankles, feeling the cool air of the lower levels of the hall meet my flustered skin. I fell onto my bed, the grumbling that always accompanied the entrance of the beast rumbling through my chest.  
I felt my own hand on my body, but let the memory of her body flood my brain. I imagined how she would feel squirming under me, her face open and unguarded, her body free for me to touch after so much time spent merely looking. All of my ideas of her body came to fruition from my own imagination, as I had never lain with a Dunmer woman before.  
In my mind it was her fingers wrapping around my length, and the heat that I felt growing and building in the room was from her excitement as well as my own. In my mind she was there with me, the curves I had so accurately experienced moments before pressed against me once more. I squeezed my eyes shut and focused on how she felt, only guessing at how soft her skin must have been under that strange armor.  
I could imagine her mouth forming my name, her hair spread like a halo of loose curls around her head and I tried to imagine whether or not she had scars. Her body writhed under mine and I could only imagine how she would moan when she was close, and that pushed me over the edge.  
I made my way back to her after wiping myself clean and pulling my trousers back up. Embarrassed by my abrupt exit I watched her for a moment before making my return known. She was still standing in the yard, tucking something into her pocket. I sniffed the air, hoping that there was still enough of the beast alert within me for me to learn where her strange garb had come from.  
She raised her arm and I inhaled deeply, glad that most Companions were out on jobs so that they wouldn’t see me looking like a complete lunatic. I wrinkled up my nose as it was invaded with the reek of sewage, sweaty bodies and the metallic tinge of gold coins, only serving to confuse me more. Where would she be that would cause her armor to smell like it had been near sewer water? I’d noticed that she was exceptionally skilled in sneaking and the way that the shadows hugged her whenever possible, could she have been going through the sewers of Whiterun for something? I didn't give it much thought, as I could feel darker thoughts of her late night visitor returning, and knew that it was a bad place for my mind to go.  
I could see her waiting and walked out, witnessing the glow of oncoming moonlight on the dark waterfall of her hair. My inner beast threatened to break free once more as she turned to me, her outline clearly lit against the lowering Sun. She smiled at me and I struggled to keep the beast back, but her hand resting on her hip was almost my undoing.  
I withdrew the sword once more, intending to have nothing else interrupt our lesson, actually wanting to teach her as well as getting the chance to be so close to her. I placed the sword in her delicate fingers, moving them softly with my own.  
“Your grip is off, you’re too used to one-handed weapons.” I got her hands into the correct positions, her long fingers wrapping in a way that is reminiscent of what I just imagined her doing. “Here, keep your hands like this, and widen your stance, and you’re good.”  
My eyes closed of their own accord and I couldn’t contain the beast’s growl in my throat, no longer caring if she knew. I felt her hand fall away from the sword and feared that she was going to rebuff my touch, pulling me closer to reality, until her hand found its way to land on my thigh.  
I was almost painfully aware of each finger pressing into the muscle of my thigh, her thumb resting dangerously close to a part of my body that she had just affected so greatly. Her hand began to slide upward, and that was it for my self control.  
I spun her around, the sword clattering to the ground as my hands found her hips. She looked shocked at first and I couldn’t stop myself from kissing her, likely more beast than man at that point. I felt her kissing me, her hands sliding into my hair, and that was all the allowance I needed. Her fingers twisted until they had a tight grip, sending jolts of arousal downward.  
I allowed the beast’s mind to overtake the man’s, working one hand under her jerkin to be met with skin as soft and cool as I had imagined. I heard a moan tumble out of my mouth and into hers, her fingers tugging lightly at my hair, eliciting the perfect feeling that only spurred me on.  
Moving my kisses down her throat I heard the most wonderful sound come from her, somewhere between a moan and an attempt to say my name. I tugged on her armor to lower it on her body, giving myself access to pieces of skin that I had never before seen on her, marking her throat and shoulder with the early signs of hickeys. Her fingers dug into my arm and I knew that I should stop, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.  
After so long of fantasizing about her I wasn’t going to give up so early, wanting to savor every movement and every sound that she made before I pulled back. I would pull back, I knew it, but not yet. Her head was leaned back and she was panting lightly, angling herself to give me the perfect amount of access to her skin. I could see and feel the different reactions that came from each kiss, each bite, every one of them causing her to wiggle against my hips.  
I wrapped one arm around her waist and almost couldn’t bear the thought of pulling away from her, finding myself once more painfully erect as she moaned my name. She tugged at my armor, clearly signalling that she wanted it off, but I knew that I wouldn’t be able to give her what she wanted in the moment. The risk was too great, but I allowed myself to lavish in the small window of time I had left with her body so open to me.  
She raised one leg and wrapped it around my waist, her back leaning on the wall, angling her hips into mine. Her hands ran to the tips of my hair and down to my shoulders, fingers leaving behind a trail of gooseflesh in their wake. I felt her teeth nip at my lower lip and her hips rubbing on mine and I pushed her into the wall, knowing that I had to stop before the beast broke through completely and I hurt her.  
I pulled back, panting, looking at her for a moment before I spoke. Her hair was tousled and her lips were swelling slightly from the roughness of my kiss, her eyes fiery and wild. She lunged forward but I kept her pressed against the wall. Although I wasn’t as strong as Farkas, I was by no means weak.  
Her armor was lifted to reveal her stomach and hips to me, the bones jutting to create the perfect angle that drew my attention south of her beltline. All of her skin was flushed and I couldn’t help but let my thumb brush across her stomach, wanting to memorize how smooth her skin was. I could feel the beast growling in the back of my mind and knew that I had to draw back before something happened, before I lost control. Her eyes met mine and I could feel her pushing against my hold, trying to bring her body close to mine once more. I couldn’t let her do it; if I let her close the distance between us, I knew that I was never going to be able to stop. My words came out as nothing more than a whisper and I swore that I could feel a weight on my heart as I said them.  
“I can’t.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know your opinions on smut/no smut so that I know if I should post the other half of this


	6. Kyrah POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of 2 of the smut chapters. Vilkas wants to pull back, but Kyrah knows his secret

His kiss was rougher than I would have guessed, his lips moving almost angrily on mine. His hands were clasped firmly onto my hips and pushed me back into the wall at the edge of the yard until I was caught between it and his body. His breath was hot and I felt his hand work its way under my Guild armor, fingers brushing blindly on the underside of my breast.   
Oh gods, he felt good. At the time I couldn’t tell if I really wanted him or if it just felt good to have someone who wanted me, but I didn’t care. His body was so solid, so real, and so responsive to mine, and it had been months since Brynjolf had first touched me. Vilkas had been so cold and distant through my weeks spent at Jorrvaskr I couldn’t help but wonder what had brought this on, but I didn’t feel any guilt at the possibility of using him to heal the wounds Brynjolf had left in his gaping absence.   
Wrapping a leg around his waist I dragged him closer to myself, his leg pinning mine to the cool stone of the wall. After finding out everything about my position as someone who held the potential to either save or kill everyone, it felt amazing to finally let someone else be in control. I could tell that he was enjoying it too, his body fully in charge of if and when I was allowed to move. His kiss was rough and demanding as it worked its way down my throat and I pushed my pelvis toward his, trying to tell him to get on with it.   
He pulled away slightly, his hands still holding me firmly against the wall. For a moment I thought that he was just looking at me and I smiled, leaning in to kiss him once more. But he rebuked me, keeping me a safe distance from himself, his hands the only part of him still touching me.   
“I can’t.”  
“Vilkas,” I whispered his name and a grimace appeared, his face turning into that cold mask of unfeeling that often meant that he was going to leave soon.   
“Yes?” His voice was deep and husky, much more attractive than the tone he used to ask me why I was bothering him.   
“I want you.”   
I could see the lust in his eyes and his his grimace slipped into a thin line, his lips pressing together. His hands fell from my skin and he set me back steadily on my feet, taking another step away from me. His breath was uneven and he met my gaze, making me squirm, wanting to get closer to him again.  
“I can’t do it,” he paused, his eyes combing down my front, “I might hurt you. You don’t know what I could do if I lost control, even for a moment.” He looked into the dark sky, seeming to count the slowly appearing stars. He was clearly trying to end this moment between us, but I wasn’t having it. He was my cure to the sickness Brynjolf had left me with and I wasn’t going to let him slip through my fingers.   
“Farkas told me,” I lowered my voice and placed a hand on his chest, attempting to pull his attention back to me. “I saw it.” Sliding my hand down I saw the crotch of his trousers twitch in response and smirked. Leaning in I let my hand fall to the rise in the fabric of his pants, trailing soft kisses along his clenched jaw.  
“I want you.”  
All that it took was that last whisper in his ear and he let go. His jaw unclenched and he allowed me to draw his hand from his side, his fist loosening significantly. I untied the top of my Guild armor and rested his hand on my chest, his fingers curling around my collar bone.   
“I think you can control yourself,” his eyes flicked up to meet mine at my words, his fingers working at the various buckles that kept my Guild armor in place.   
“I don’t think I can.” His voice was unsure as he loosened the last tie, the leather falling loose around my waist and his eyes left mine once again. I felt my face flush as he took in my form, but I knew that if I shied away he was going to close in upon himself once more. I allowed my false confidence to keep his attention, wanting him to focus on me instead of his lycanthropy.   
I looped my fingers into his belt, pulling his lips flush against mine and found his ear through the strands of lovely dark hair. I felt his shallow breath on my shoulder and his hands found my waist, pushing the leather away.   
“Prove it.”  
I felt his smile on the skin of my shoulder and he let my armor fall to the ground, the cold air hitting skin that was almost always covered with at least one layer of armor. His lips claimed every inch of my throat and down my chest, leaving behind a light layer of saliva from his bites. Each one somehow felt better than the last as he moved down, his hands unbuttoning my pants.   
He tugged my pants down expertly and glanced up at me before his mouth found its way beneath my smallclothes. Stars exploded in my field of vision when I felt the hot touch of his tongue, my hips jerking forward to meet his mouth. He smiled and I heard him chuckling, his hands holding the back of my thighs lightly. I was grateful for his support, as it was likely that my strength was going to be sapped out from the perfect muscles of his tongue.   
“Gods,” I gasped as he ran his tongue along my lower lips, my hair falling to tickle my back. His fingers crept up to my rear, his touch deliciously warm as he stood, wiping his face on the sleeve of his armor.   
He looked me over as I kicked off my boots, the lower half of my armor falling onto the ground. I smiled as he unbuckled his armor and I was anxious to see what resided inside of it. I knew that he wasn’t known for the same physical attributes as his brother, but he didn’t look wiry.   
His skin was the typical Nord coloring, but the muscles that were clear under the skin drew my attention. He had a thin layer of dark hair covering his chest and I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, keeping his body close to mine in the cool of the night. He met my gaze, his eyes more alive than I had seen them yet.   
He took a breath and his face became steely once more, his grip around my waist tightening. He held me tight against the wall once more and bit his lip, a familiar poke in my thigh alerting me that it was finally the time I had been waiting for.   
I felt him enter me, stretching me, my eyes feeling like they rolled back in my head. I clung to him and knew that he was going to be in control, his body pinning mine to the wall, his first few thrusts slow and even. I groaned happily at his presence, loving the feeling of someone so real and so close.   
He began panting as his thrusts became harder and more uneven, his hips rocking eagerly to meet mine. This was the best I’d felt in months, his body meeting mine making me feel full and whole, a feeling I never got with Brynjolf.   
I barely remembered what I was saying, knowing that curses were flying out of my mouth with every bone shaking, amazing thrust that he pushed into me. I clawed at his shoulders and he grunted quietly, but I didn’t know what was going on, too lost in the sensations he was bringing out in me.  
It took one last thrust and I felt my body seize around him, my muscles loosening and my stress flowing out with my orgasm. I gasped and moaned and knew that I was probably making a racket but I didn’t care. He was close and I could tell he was enjoying himself, his teeth biting his lip and I closed my eyes, loving every second of his touch.   
He pushed into me one last time and I felt a heat spread inside of me. His sweaty forehead rested on my shoulder and his hot breath hit my shoulder, his tight hold on my waist never loosening. I felt more relaxed than I had in months, my anxiety dissipating as I relished in the heat of his body. His skin was warm and stuck to mine, keeping me close to him.   
He looked up at me and looked shocked that he had contained himself, even more shocked than when he found out that I knew about the wolf that lived inside of him. He pulled back and I started to smile, but then I saw the look on his face as he pulled away from me. He looked more hurt than I’d seen him, his face paling and his body slumping from its usual ramrod straight stature.   
“What? What’s wrong?” I worried for a moment that he was going to give in to the wolf inside of him, fighting the urge to grab my weapon.   
The look on his face broke my heart, and then I knew that my want for him was more than blind companionship. He pulled his pants on slowly, as if his strength had left him, his eyes showing me how hurt he was. Before he turned his back on me he bit his lip, his voice lower than a whisper.  
“You said his name.”


	7. Vilkas POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas reacts badly, the wolf finally overtaking him, and Kyrah's correspondence with Brynjolf only spurs him on.

I didn’t know what to do with myself after I heard his name pass over her lips, but I was already on the edge of my orgasm. I felt it spill inside of her, but any closeness that I had felt for her was gone. I had thought that she wanted me, I was so sure that she had wanted me, the look in her eyes had seemed so genuine, but in her mind she saw him.   
“Vilkas please,” she walked toward me, one arm wrapped around her breasts, the other stretching out toward me. I pulled on my last boot and turned away from her, the anger throbbing through me as the arousal had not long ago, though the beast was threatening to emerge for a different reason. This time it wanted to hunt, to run freely and attempt to take all of my anger out on some unwitting animal in the hunting ground.   
I knew that I could turn around and forgive her and it might have lead to the relationship that I had wanted with her, but I would never be able to forgive her for moaning his name. It had sounded so natural as if she had said it a million times before, and just thinking about it made the anger flare up in my chest.   
“Stay away from me, whelp.”   
My voice was colder than I had meant it to be, but when I felt her fingers brush on my shoulder the beast almost broke loose. She stopped short and I threw open the doors to Jorrvaskr, the mead hall opening up in front of me. I saw Farkas sitting in the corner of the room and he stood to walk toward me, a hopeful smile spreading across his face.   
I slammed the greatsword down on the cabinet and barged down the stairs, trying to keep him from bothering me right now, the beast blood pushing heavily through my veins. I knew that I was going to need to get rid of this armor if I didn’t want to tear through it, and was struggling to get out of it before I made my way to my quarters. I tore the armor over my head and threw it onto my bed, hurrying to pull on a simple pair of pants before rushing out through the mead hall once more.  
I ran through the Underforge and out of Whiterun, every second that passed allowing the beast to appear more and more. The world opened outside of Whiterun and I felt the thin pants rip, the man’s mind slipping away as the wolf took over.   
I could just picture her face in my head, her mouth curved into the most seductive smirk, her hair falling down her back as her body arched to meet mine. Her throat was exposed and her eyes were closed, small pants escaping her that still made me want her. I had wanted her so badly, each thrust making me want her more and more, until I heard his name defiling her lips.   
Brynjolf. The thief that had snuck his way into Jorrvaskr’s hallowed halls to touch her, climbing bravely into her bed. I remember the smirk on his face when he looked at me, so sure of himself, so smug. As I ran I let the anger fuel me, my sense of smell picking up a hint of the same smell that had clung to her armor. Sewage water and him.   
I lifted my head in the air, trying to detect where it was coming from. I ran in that direction, the scent growing stronger, sure that I was going to find him lurking somewhere in the shadows. In my mind I could feel him watching me, laughing at me from a safe distance, somehow already knowing that she had called out his name when I was inside her. I didn’t know how he could have known that, but my anger had wiped out my sense of reason as I stomped through the dusky light.   
Although I’d expected to find him, I found nothing more than a note held to a trunk of a tree with an arrow. In thick, untrained handwriting it said her name and I smelled him on it, anger flaring up once more.   
_Kyrah -_

_I received your letter and I’d like to thank you for your briskness. I had been wondering if I should come after you, bring you back to the Guild, but now I know that it would be no use._   
_I saw the way you looked at him, and I just hope that he takes care of you the way that you deserve. I wish I could have brought you back to Riften, but I hope that the Companions make you happy._   
_Don’t forget about the us back here at home, lass. You’re still our Guild Master, no matter what other obligations you have._

I must have read that letter a dozen times before I realized that the beast had receded, leaving me nothing more than a man with some tattered pants hanging around my legs. My skin was that of a Nord once more and my fingers were the only thing clinging to the weather worn paper, the claws that had poked holes in the paper no longer elongated.  
I heard the grass rustling and whirled around, groping at air, wishing that I had my weapon with me. I backed up and prepared to unleash the wolf inside me once again, but then I saw a thin figure creeping through the grass. For a moment I allowed my body to lower into combat stance, but then they took a deep breath and I knew that it was her. She was coming here right after we had been together, probably hoping to see him.   
“Kyrah.”   
She stopped short, the moonlight illuminating a face that I had so recently seen relaxed and open with orgasm. She glared at me for a moment, her hand sneaking to the hilt of her sword and a million questions whirled through my mind. Was she coming here to meet him? How long had she been with him? Had she used me as nothing more as a stand-in for the man she really wanted to be with? What the hell was a Guild Master?  
“Vilkas.”  
Her voice was just as sharp as mine and I felt a stir in what was left of my pants, her eyes blazing through the shadow of her hood. She took a step toward me and raised her weapon, the magic of it clearly exhibited in the swirling mist that surrounded it and the glow that seemed to be coming straight from the metal.   
“Who were you expecting to meet here?” I allowed this one question to escape me, his letter to her still balled up in my hands.   
“I think you already know the answer to that.”  
She stepped over a stump and came face to face with me, the slope of her nose mere inches from my chin. She glared up at me and I felt the blade press against the skin of my thigh, feeling somehow like ice in the relatively warm night.   
I allowed my sadness and hurt to turn into anger, fueling the anger that had already been ignited by his letter to her. She had obligations elsewhere, clearly the Thieves Guild as he mentioned Riften. She was the Guild Master there, so what was she doing with the Companions? If she was involved with those types of people, maybe she didn’t belong with us at all.   
He knew her before I did, he likely knew her better than I did. He probably knew what she liked and what she didn’t, which places to touch that drove her mad that I might not ever learn about. Each thought that occurred about them only added to the fire of my anger until I couldn’t take it anymore.  
“Do you love him?”   
She didn’t answer me, her eyes pleading for something but I couldn’t tell what. She sheathed her weapon again and she reached a hand toward me, but I knew that she didn’t want to answer me. My anger ravaged through my body and I couldn’t stand the condescending look on her face anymore.   
I could tell that there was something between us that was likely her love for him, but I didn’t care. Her lips were still swollen from my kisses and I leaned down, capturing her mouth in mine, not caring about if it hurt her.   
She pressed her body to mine and I knew that she was probably thinking of him but I didn’t care. I was the one there touching her, lifting her armor over her head, exposing her skin to me once more. I didn’t care if she thought of him, the reality was that it was me holding her hips, it was my lips leaving blossoming hickeys on her chest. No matter what she thought about I could feel her wetness between her legs and kissed her stomach, much less gentle than the first time I gained access to her body.   
In that moment, I didn’t care if she thought about him, because all that I could think about was her.


	8. Kyrah POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short smutty chapter with a little fluff at the end

His lips were on my body for the second time that night and no matter how good it felt, I knew that he hated me. His fingers no longer gracefully touched my skin, they left small marks when they held me against the tree. I couldn’t help kissing him back, knowing that I had to make the most of my time with him. Even if he hated me I wanted as much of him as I could get.   
He tore my armor over my head and I gasped, his lips claiming every inch of my body. I could see the anger clear on his face as he ripped my pants down and I tugged at his hair, urging him to get on with it. I knew that he hated me but I didn’t care because it felt so good.   
He pushed himself into me and wrapped my legs around his waist, his armor still covering his chest and shoulders. I unbuckled it and shoved it to the ground, wrapping my arms around his neck to keep myself steady. He refused to meet my gaze and I kissed his cheek, his forehead, anything within my reach to try to grab his attention.   
I groaned, unable to wrap my head around how good it felt. He was more in tune with my body, much different from Brynjolf’s almost selfish attitude toward sex. Vilkas, although he was angry at me, was still angling himself to make sure that I felt every move he made. His strong hands held me steady and I felt his steamy breath hit my skin, every inch of my body aware of where he was touching me.  
“You gonna say his name again?”  
He grunted his words at me in time with his thrusts, his eyes burning for the fleeting moment they met mine. I felt my orgasm building once more and yanked his head back, forcing him to meet my gaze. I felt my muscles contracting around his length and warmth spread through me, every piece of my body feeling calm as he thrust into me one last time, his eyes still meeting mine.   
“Vilkas,” his name slid out of my mouth and he glared at me and I bit my lip, waiting to see how he was going to react. His hands slid from around me and he set me down, grabbing his armor and beginning to walk away.  
“Get back here.”   
I allowed my voice to ring through the trees, feeling safe enough with his presence that I didn’t fear any animals that could have been watching us. He stopped walking and I reached down, tugging on my pants before he had a chance to walk away again.   
“What do you want from me, whelp?”  
He glared at me over his shoulder, his eyes burning as they met mine through the darkness. I knew that he was trying to distance himself from me by calling me a whelp, but I’d seen the way his face had blushed when I touched him.   
“Nothing,” I walked toward him, wrapping my arms around his neck. He looked confused, his hands still resting on the buckles of his armor and I kissed him. My mouth hurt from the force of his kiss but this was gentle, his hands not moving from his chest.   
I looked at him, my mind spinning with the events of the day. He had touched me in ways that no one since Brynjolf had touched me, but I didn’t feel like he thought of me as just another number. It had felt so good to finally have his attention, to finally see something in his eyes other than disinterest. He had wanted me just as I had wanted him, even if it was only that first time.   
“I don’t love him, I promise.”   
I combed one hand through his hair, the heat from his body keeping me from feeling the invasive cold that my armor usually kept out. His face softened and I could feel my anxiety dispel some once I knew that he wasn’t going to walk away from me again. His hands dropped from his armor and I could feel his fingers on his my hip, bringing a smile to my face.   
“He left me alone when I thought that I loved him. He let me think that he loved me when he didn’t so that I would keep bringing in money for him, but he didn’t love me.”  
He pressed a kiss on my forehead and all of my stress slipped away. He wasn’t going to walk away again, just like the last man who I had trusted had done. He was at least going to stay with me for the moment, unlike Brynjolf who walked out as soon as the physical aspect of our relationship was over.   
“Were you coming here to meet him tonight?” His voice was still quiet and held an undertone of anger, but it was less violent than before. He wasn’t shaking and his hands were still as they held my hips.   
“No.” I thought about leaving it at that, but knew that it wasn’t satisfactory. “This was where we would leave letters to one another. He would pass it along with whatever member was coming down here on a job and I’d leave my answers for them to take back when they returned.”  
“Member?”  
Oh gods, I’d let slip that I was a part of another group besides the Companions. Of course if he found out that I was in the Guild he wasn’t going to allow me into the group of people that are meant to upholding the honor of Skyrim’s great fighter. He wasn’t going to want a common thief who had made their way through life on the coin of others to join him in combat.   
“Was there a letter here?” I remained relatively quiet, eager to find out to find out what he had said when I told him that I was giving up on him. It wasn’t entirely Vilkas’s fault that I had given up on Brynjolf, but the security that he gave me made it feel so much safer than my lonely thoughts.   
“Yes.”  
He placed a crumpled piece of paper in my hand and I could feel the puncture marks in it and knew how angry he must have gotten. I opened the letter to read his words, noticing that as always, he was more focused on the Guild than on me, although the letter was about the end of my affections for him. I knew that he was never going to give up the Guild, but I was never going to be able to give up the burden this Dragonborn business had put on me.   
“Are you going to go back to Riften?”  
His voice was soft, his breath brushing my hair away from my face and I let the letter fall to the ground. I didn’t need to hold onto his words anymore. I didn’t want them.   
“No,” I looked up at him, planting a kiss on his mouth. “I want to stay right here with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As we get farther into the story, I've finally decided how it's going to end, and I hope that you like it!


	9. Vilkas POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas accompanies Kyrah on her trip to Riften, only to be met with some unnerving advice. 
> 
> I do not own Skyrim, Riften, Vilkas, the Companions, the Thieves Guild, Keeravah, or anything other than my original character. All credit goes to Bethesda.

She kept true to her word for the most part. She did stay with me in Whiterun through every trouble that arose, and I knew that she wasn’t going to leave. She made a few visits to Riften, never lying to me about where she was going. It had bothered me that she was so closely involved with the Thieves Guild, but there was nothing that I could do to change it. She had been her own person before me and had lived her life the way she wanted to, and nothing I did could take back the choices she had made that had led her to the Thieves Guild and ultimately to him.   
I felt her slide away from me, tempted to grab her waist and make her stay. I knew that as soon as she got out of bed she was gone, her mind already planning the trip to Riften and far away from me. I grumbled and slid an arm around her waist, the exposed skin of my legs brushing against the sheets.   
“Go back to sleep,” she brushed her fingers through my hair, so much gentler than she had touched me the previous night. Thinking about it still brought a smile to my face as I remembered her in the exact position that I had imagined so long ago. The candlelight was illuminating her face and her back arched up against me, moans falling from her lips that were so much better in real life than my imagination.   
I pressed a kiss to her back, feeling her warm skin under my lips as she started to peel my fingers off of her. I tried to keep her there with me, not wanting to be alone for the next week, but I knew that I would ultimately lose this struggle. She was going to leave because she had a duty to her Guild, no matter how much I fought her to stay.   
“Just stay with me.” It was softer than I had intended it, but knew that it was going to have the same effect on her. We had been through this conversation every time she needed to leave but I was still going to have it.   
“I can’t,” she turned to me, her lips brushing across mine in the smallest hint of a kiss. She smiled, her fingers dancing over my back, leaving a trail of tingling skin in their wake. I saw her look at me and felt so whole at that moment that I felt guilty about every second I’d spent doubting her intentions with me. Even though I might have been a replacement for her the first time we were together, every time after that I’d known that she was mine.   
She kissed my nose and I felt so loved that I couldn’t stand the thought of being here without her for a whole week. I had offered to accompany her the first time, but she knew that a Companion wouldn’t bode well in the company of thieves. I didn’t have a problem with the way they lived their lives, Riften was none of my concern. It had long been nothing but a hive for criminal activity, and they weren’t expanding to Whiterun yet that I knew of. But he would be there, and she thought that I couldn’t handle it.   
I rested on my back as she started to clothe herself for the journey ahead. She donned her Guild armor, the thin layers of leather still so foreign to me compared to the armor most Companions wore. She tugged her pants onto her body and I reached out, hating that I was met with leather instead of skin.   
“At least let me go with you up there, I’ll just stay at an inn outside of town if you don’t want me to go in there with you.” Kneeling on the edge of the bed I kissed her back, knowing that this new tactic was something she couldn’t say no to. He wouldn’t see me and I wouldn’t see him; I was even willing to stay out of the city if that’s what it took. I’d made the journey to Riften only once before and had encountered everything from wolves to pockets of bandits along the road, and feared each time she left.   
“There’s no inns outside of Riften.” She rested her hands on mine, warm fingers twisting with mine. “I guess you’ll just have to stay at the Bee and Barb.”  
That took me aback. She hardly even let me accompany her to the edge of Whiterun, let alone allowing me to enter Riften at her side. Once she got to Riften I knew that she once more was a thief, the Guild Master, the one who held the power in town. She wasn’t a Companion when she was there and I was eager to see such a different side of the woman I had grown so close to.   
“Really?” I sounded like an excited little boy but I didn’t care.   
“If you hurry up and get ready, yes, I’ve got a schedule to keep.”  
I could hear the smile in her voice and she slipped out of my grasp, continuing the process of pulling on all of her armor. I scrambled out of bed, wanting to get clothed and on the road before she could change her mind. This would be the first time in almost a year that she would let me into this part of her life and I wasn’t about to give up a chance to see her in such a different element. I wanted to spend this week with her, learning, instead of sitting in the mead hall of Jorrvaskr and worrying.   
I followed her out of the hall, feeling more like a lost puppy following on her heels than the protective presence I was supposed to be. Her body looked so different as she made her way through town, looking like the confident girl in Thieves Guild armor that had walked into Jorrvaskr almost a year ago.   
“You sure you want to come?”  
She looked back at me as she saddled up a horse, easily jumping into the right position. I smiled and mounted the horse next to her, nodding quickly to the stable boy before she took off ahead of me.   
I kept a safe distance behind her, watching her hand flit between her weapon and the reigns of her horse. It was difficult to watch the roads with my eyes stuck on her, though I hardly knew my way to Riften and needed to follow her.   
After hours on the road from Whiterun with only a few wolves as an interruption I saw the city wall rising out of the trees, the voices of the guards drifting down the road. I followed her movements as we led our horses to the stables, her eyes watching the guards carefully. She moved past them, one of them stopping her.   
“Visitor’s tax.” She laughed quickly in front of me at that, crossing her arms over her chest.   
“No, she’s the one I was telling you about.” The other and clearly more experienced guard knocked his hand on the first speaker’s shoulder, quickly recoiling. His eyes were watching Kyrah and questions rose in my mind. Was she really that influential?  
“Oh, go on then.”  
Both of them moved to open the doors for her and I followed quickly, not wanting to get separated and taxed by the crooked guards. The bridge systems of Riften opened up in front of me and I swore that all of the shadows were moving in my peripheral vision, but seemed empty whenever I looked either direction. The Thieves Guild was obviously powerful, leading me to believe that it was people lurking in the shadows, watching our entrance.   
“Are you going to tell him you’re here?” I walked beside her, letting my fingers rub on hers, tickling over her fingertips. She smiled up at me as if she knew something I didn’t.  
“He already knows I’m here, I’m sure.” She looked ahead, leading me to the inn at the center of the town. “He’s in charge around here, keeps track of all business happening within Riften’s city walls.”  
“And you’re in charge of?”  
“Guild business.” Of course I wasn’t going to get a different answer any different than the one that I usually got, but it was always worth trying. I could feel eyes on me as we entered the Bee and Barb, a few people milling around inside amidst the Argonians that must have ran the place.  
“One room, Keerava.” She slid some coin across the countertop, the Argonian woman behind the counter never taking her eyes off Kyrah.   
“A whole week then?” Kyrah nodded at her and grabbed my hand, leading me up the stairs. She opened a door seemingly at random and leaned on the doorframe, and I knew what was coming next. She wanted me to stay here so that she could get to business.   
“You’re leaving, then?” I sat down at the desk, unbuckling the outer layer of armor on my body. She smirked, brushing a quick kiss to my forehead before pushing my hair away from my face.  
“I’ll be back in a bit, we’ll get some dinner together.” She walked briskly out of the room and down the stairs, not a single footstep making a sound. I watched the space she had recently vacated, wondering if worrying about her from here was going to be any better than worrying about her back at Jorrvaskr. Riften had never been a place I was prone to going due to all of the thievery, but knowing that she got here safely was worth it. And judging by the reaction of the guards at the front gate she wasn’t in any danger inside the city walls either.   
“Hey,” the Argonian man who had been walking throughout the bottom level of the inn peaked his head around the corner of the staircase, only his scaly face and intense eyes visible to me. “You in town with that girl?”  
I nodded, unsure of if I should say any more. I knew that without my top layer of Companion issued armor I didn’t look like anything more than a common mercenary, thankful that nothing I carried bore any emblem of the Companions just in case there was a prejudice among the thieves that run amuck in this town. I didn’t know what side he was on in terms of criminal reputation of this city and wasn’t going to chance it.   
“You better get back to where you came from and quick, boy. No one from the Thieves Guild is anything more than trouble, and even though you might not know it, she’s one of the higher up ones. Stay away from her, or you’re putting yourself in danger.”  
He disappeared back down the stairs, leaving me confused and anxious. I had known that she was in with the Thieves Guild, but was she really dangerous to be around? I’d seen the types of blades that she kept on her body, strapped to every available part of her body when she got ready for a job, each one looking deadlier than the last.  
Could someone who was so gentle, so kind, really be dangerous? I had felt the lightest brushes of her hand, seen her at her most vulnerable, and never once had I thought that distancing myself from her would be necessary. I had been with her while she was running the Thieves Guild, but never had I thought that I needed to get away from her.   
Curiosity overcame me and I pulled a wolfskin coat around myself, making my way down the stairs. It seemed that one of the few businesses in Riften had let out and the main floor had filled to the brim, the Argonians serving drinks left and right. I made my way to the bar, finding the stool farthest from the crowd, wanting to avoid this conversation being heard by anyone else. I wasn’t even sure if I could trust the people running the inn, but I had to find out what he had meant by what he said.   
“What can I get for ya?” Her voice was rough and I leaned forward, trying to be as quiet as possible. I was suddenly acutely aware of my lack of sneakiness in a world that revolved around being sneaky. All of the business in this city took place in the shadows and in hushed voices, two things that I was very unaccustomed to.   
“I was told that the woman I arrived with was dangerous,” my voice was low but I could still almost feel those around me leaning in to listen closer, “is that true?”  
She rolled her eyes at my words, rubbing a cloth on the counter as if she was completely used to these conversations. I leaned in further, aching to know what she was so sure of.  
“She’s with the Thieves Guild, I’d recognize it anywhere. I’ve seen her with that man Brynjolf more than a few times, so if you’re anglin’ for romance, you’re out of luck. If you’re looking to make honest work, look elsewhere. That Kyrah and her little sneaks will rob you blind with a smile on their faces.”  
She turned away from me, leaving me flustered and with my stomach in knots. She’d been here with Brynjolf. When? Why? She hadn’t told me whether she stayed in the inn or down with her fellow thieves while she was in Riften, nor had I worried about it before now. Keeravah’s words had sparked a fear inside me that I didn’t even know was there until it became painfully alive. If they were together while she was here, what was happening? Could she possibly be playing me for a fool? Was I nothing more than another mark, a pitiful man being used by a skilled thief?  
My heart hurt at the thought. I couldn’t imagine that she was after nothing more than my money, but I had been suspicious when I found out where she had been before joining the Companions. I didn’t have many coins to my name, all of my valuable items were weapons, and none of them were missing. No, she loved me, I knew it.  
Images of them together invaded my mind for the first time in almost a year, and it was as if I could feel the intimate trust that I had spun with her shattering. I recalled the look on her face when I walked in on them, so oblivious to me, all of her focus on him.   
Was I still just sitting out of view, praying to get noticed by her? Was she still   
watching him, waiting for him to come back to her? And if so, how long was I going to be able to live like that?


	10. Kyrah POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas accompanies Kyrah to Riften and confronts her about the advice he got from a stranger.

Riften felt so good compared to Whiterun. It felt like I was finally coming home after spending so much time as a Thane, finally back to my place among thieves. I could see the shadows stirring around me and knew that it was the newest hopefuls, aiming at becoming real thieves.  
“Welcome home, lass.”  
His voice greeted me, reassuring me that his eyes were watching as we entered the city. I felt his hand slap on my back and was thankful for the lack of tingles that he left. His affect on me had long ago fizzled out, leaving me with nothing but an underlying resentment as I watched him bed a different woman every time I was in town. It only reminded me that I was another number to him, and was ignorant enough to let myself believe I was something more.  
“Home, yeah.” I nodded and walked toward the Cistern, meaning for this to be nothing more than a business trip.  
“Brought your lackey along with ya’?” He laughed at his own joke, arm nudging against mine. “I was wonderin’ when he’d stop trustin ya.”  
“He trusts me.” My voice was fierce and I pushed my hands against his chest, hating that he thought he knew anything about Vilkas.  
“He’s as close to the opposite of me as you could get.” He pressed the button, opening the door to the Cistern. “So I guess you were makin some changes.”  
“He is the opposite of you. And you know what?” I jabbed my finger into his chest, anger burning through my body. “He cares about me and treats me the way I deserve to be treated instead of just knocking my name off a list. He wants to be with me. He listens to me. He may be rude or brash sometimes and doesn’t know much about women, but I’d rather be his first than his two hundredth.”  
He smirked me as I made my way back up the stairs, too angry to deal with any more of him even in a business situation. I stomped my way through the cemetery and past the temple, aimed straight for the Bee and Barb.  
I knew that I loved him, even if I hadn’t said it quiet yet. The last man I thought I’d loved had turned out to be a thief in every sense of the word, taking my heart and leaving nothing in return. Vilkas had felt me felt whole and loved and although I hadn’t said it I knew that I loved him. He was unaccustomed to women and didn’t know everything, but he was loving and caring and sincere. I knew that he was never lying to me, as it was against his code of honor.  
I saw him sitting at a table inside the hall and a smile spread across my face. He was so beautifully safe, so familiar, that it took all of my will not to fall into his lap and stay there. His eyes were trained down on a book, hand sitting idly on the handle of a mug.  
“Vilkas,” I don’t know if I whispered his name to call his attention or simply as a sigh of relief, but either way he met my gaze and I felt my stress fall away. I felt so safe so close to him, wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing the top of his head. He was mine and I knew that I loved him, much more surely than the last man I thought that I had loved.  
His body was stiff under my arms and I felt horrible for allowing him to enter Riften with me. I knew that he wasn’t going to be able to stand a city so corrupt, it was probably driving him mad just knowing what must have been going on around us. I kissed his head again, closing my eyes and resting against him. He smelled like Jorrvaskr still, the old wood of the mead hall and the old pages of the books that always surrounded him. He smelled and felt like home.  
“I love you.” I kissed his head once more, my heart racing at the thought that I had openly admitted something that momentous. I felt him relax some, his arms snaking around my waist and holding me close to him. I smiled anxiously against his head, waiting for him to say something. I had long thought that although it went unsaid we did love one another, but I was worrying that I had misread our situation.  
“Do you?”  
He looked up at me and I could see in his eyes that his mind was working through something. His hands rested on the back of my thighs and he held me close, his eyes analyzing my face.  
“Of course I do.” I pressed a kiss to the tip of his nose and smiled, my fingers tugging their way through the knots in his hair. His hands fell away from my body and I felt him lightly push me away.  
Panic rose in my chest at his movements, fearing that he was going to push me away for good. Maybe he didn’t really love me and I had just fooled myself into believing that he did. He looked at me, his brain still trying to work through something, and I fought the urge to take him in my arms again. He looked so sad, his mouth a grim line as he leaned forward in his chair.  
“Kyrah,” he said my name as if it was the hardest thing in the world for him to do, his hands tangling and untangling together repeatedly. He stood up, head hanging low and my heart sunk. I’d never seen him act this way, and knew that it meant something bad was coming my way. His fingers squeezed my elbow lightly, leading me up to the room we’d rented.  
I followed him, each step feeling like I was walking toward my own doom. He walked beside me, his hand never leaving my arm, but it was in no way affectionate. His eyes refused to meet mine and I bit back the threat of tears, knowing that I needed to stay strong through whatever happened.  
He sat down on the bed, leaving me standing in the center of the room, watching as his fingers knit together nervously. His eyes were flicking all around the room and I heard him take quite a few deep breaths, each one making me fear what he was planning to say. His feet were tapping on the wooden ground and I crossed my arms in an attempt to quell my anxiety.  
He looked up at me, his eyes somber as he met my gaze. I felt my will weaken and I longed to fall into his warmth. I wished for his arms around my waist and his kisses in my hair, not this odd cold distance that hadn’t come between us since the first time we were together almost a year ago.  
“You should close the door.”  
His voice was hushed and sharp, his hands wringing together as I pulled the door closed. His eyes watched me the entire time, his face paling with each passing second. If he so clearly didn’t want distance from me I would have felt his forehead, worrying that he was getting sick.  
“What’s going on?” My voice shook with fear and I felt my hands numbing from the lack of circulation. My whole body felt cold and dozens of different situations whirled through my head, each one worse than the last.  
“You should sit down.”  
I took a seat, following his instruction, fearing the bad news that he so obviously was going to deliver. I rested my elbow on the desk, bumping on the book that he had been reading. Glancing down I found that it was Fall From Glory, the tale of the Thieves Guild and its descent from former recognition.  
He sighed and looked up at me, his face a mask of unfeeling coldness as he leaned forward on the bed. I felt his hesitance in the air around us mixing with my own fear, wishing that he would just finally just say what he was going to say to me. His evident sadness was only making me feel worse, foreshadowing the news.  
“We need to talk.” He took a deep breath, his voice shaking as much as my own, “about us.”


	11. Vilkas POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas gets the answer he's waiting for, but gets rudely interrupted by the Guild's presence
> 
> I do not own Vilkas, Sapphire, Brynjolf, Riften, Skyrim, or anything other than my original character, all credit goes to Bethesda!

She sat up straight, her eyes wide as they met mine. I felt horrible about what I was going to ask her, but I knew that it had to be asked. She looked fearful and I worried that she was fearing telling me the truth, but I couldn’t live without knowing if being with her was putting me in danger. I hated the thought that I might have to protect myself against her.  
“Are you,” I bit my lip, making sure that I had the correct word in my mind, “dangerous?”   
Her face was pale as she watched me, a small smile breaking through the fearful grimace that had long resided there. She leaned forward, running a hand through the hair that I had admired so many times through our year together.   
“No, I’m not dangerous.” She leaned toward me and rested a hand on top of mine, calming my anxiety some. “I’m in charge of a bunch of sneaks who make a living by stealing from the rich to keep them in line. Most of them only carry a single dagger because they are avidly against the use of weapons.” She squeezed my fingers in hers, a reassuring smile on her still nervous looking face. “The only reason I come here anymore is to check the numbers, since the last Guild Master ended up cleaning us out. I promise that none of us are dangerous.”  
I felt the fear seep out of my body and smiled, knowing that it must have been nothing more than a disgruntled patron in Riften. I should have known, this town was nothing but trouble.   
I pulled her closer, feeling her knees rest on either side of my legs, her arms easily falling around my neck. I smiled, remembering the words that I had been too nervous to respond. She loved me. She had admitted that she loved me, finally, openly. I had long known that we loved one another, but she had finally said it.   
“I love you.” I mumbled the words against her armor, kissing across her chest and down her arm. I felt her lips on my forehead and everything felt so right in the world at that moment. I didn’t care that we were in the center of criminal activity, surrounded by thieves and cutthroats. I didn’t care that she was the leader of the Thieves Guild, I didn’t care about anything other than the fact that I loved her.   
She smiled, her hands gently cupping my face, and I couldn’t help but look at her. I had always felt secondary to my brother due to his superior strength, but his exploits with women were never going to lead him to something as true and strong as her presence in my life. I had always been somewhat jealous of how easy it was for him to speak to women, but I knew that his lines would never work on her.   
“I love you so much.” A grin spread across her face at my words that was so genuine that I couldn’t believe that she had ever loved anyone else. Her eyes were clear of the worry that had filled them earlier and her skin was flushed after the fearful pale.  
Her body pressing against mine felt so good it made me wonder how I had ever lived my life so solitary. It had been years between the last woman who had touched my heart and when I met her, and it made me wonder how I’d spent so much time without her. When she left me the air around me felt so empty and I missed the warm, solid feeling of having her at my side.   
I had quickly learned that although she was skilled with a weapon in her hands, the muscles that her skills produced were also very useful in other situations. I had seen her in a variety of positions and knew that if she didn’t move away soon, my body was going to react to her closeness.   
The kisses she was pressing to my face began to move downward and became slower, more deliberate as her hands worked their way under my armor. Tilting my head back I smiled, wondering if this would be any different now that we had admitted that we loved one another openly.   
She unbuckled my armor and pushed it off, her lips clamping down on every inch of available skin. Her waist felt so familiar in my hands I hardly had to think about what I was doing as I held her closer, my blood rushing to a part of me below my belt.   
Two fingers snuck into the waistband of my pants and tugged at them, non verbally telling me that she wanted them off my body. I laughed quietly, unbuckling the once confusing armor that covered her body, exposing the skin that was always sure to catch my attention. Her stomach was strong and her waist curved in a way that drew my eyes downward, the leather taunt on her thighs, urging me to tear them off of her.   
She smiled and brushed the lightest of kisses down my throat, her breath tickling its way across my skin. I felt her fingers dance over the crotch of my pants, outlining a part of my body that was quickly becoming home to most of the blood in my body. She knew what she was doing and bit down gently on the lobe of my ear, my body arching up to rub against hers.   
“Gods I love you.” My voice was nothing more than a gasp as she bit down on my neck, her hand finally entering my pants, her fingers wrapping around me in a way that made me feel like nothing else existed other than her.   
She chuckled quietly, her lips leaving a trail of kisses and tingles down my chest. I let my fingers stroke through her hair, wishing she wouldn’t have to work and we could spend the entire week away from Jorrvaskr like this. I didn’t want her to leave, her fingers and her kisses the only thing in the world that mattered to me.   
“I need to get back to work,” her words were quiet as they met my skin, her forehead resting under my chin.   
“Work can wait.” I kissed the top of her head, slipping her off of my lap and letting her fall onto the bed. She smiled up at me, her hands untying her pants and slipping them off her body. She smirked at me, her eyes watching me as her bare legs came into view, her toes barely tickling the side of my legs.   
“I guess it can wait for a little bit.” She smiled, reaching her arms out toward me, and I couldn’t help myself from crawling on top of her. Her body was so warm and inviting I felt the need to press kisses along her chest, her fingers moving to untie my pants.   
Her body pressed to mine and I felt goosebumps raise from her touch, still as wonderful as the first time she gave me access to her body. She still made me feel like this was our first time, her smile just as inviting as the body that was exposed to me. I felt my pants fall from my body and her legs wrapped around my waist, drawing me into the warmth of her body.   
“I love you.”   
I only had a moment to get the words out before her mouth captured mine, her heat drawing me into her body. I groaned at the explosion of stars behind my eyes as I felt her moan against my lips, drawing the blanket over our bodies.   
She felt so good I forgot that we were in Riften. I forgot that just moments ago I had feared that being with her was putting me in danger. I forgot that the man who had hurt her was just a few steps away. I forgot that I had ever doubted her faithfulness to me. I forgot everything that wasn’t her in that moment.   
She pressed her body up to mine and I kissed along her throat, her eyes closing in a way that I had become accustomed to. I could tell what I needed to do by the different expressions that graced her face, and knew what she needed.   
I clamped my hands down over her wrists, holding them firmly to the bed. She gasped and I bit down on her throat, hearing the quietest moan escape from her mouth. Her hips bucked against mine and I knew that I had succeeded, leaving bite marks along the delicate stretch of skin between her throat and her collar bone.   
“You’re mine.”   
It wasn’t a question or an act of ownership, rather it was a statement that she was mine and an inference that I was hers. I knew that no matter where she went she was going to be mine, but leaving a few hickeys behind wouldn’t hurt. Her arms raised against my hold but I kept her still, only her hips able to move up against mine.   
“Always.” She gasped out the word as she threw her head back and I felt her muscles contracting. Her eyes met mine for a fleeting second and she shivered slightly, her breath coming out in small pants. I remembered the first time we were together, the way that her body pressed so tightly against mine had made me lose control entirely.   
I barely heard the creak of the door opening over her panting and the lack of blood flowing to my ears, and wasn’t aware that anyone else had entered the room until their voice broke through the bubble that we had been engulfed in.   
“Brynjolf wants to see you. Now.”  
I felt her jump beneath me, her eyes flashing open as she grabbed the edge of the blanket to cover her chest. Upon turning around I saw a girl with cropped brown hair with her arms crossed, her eyes glaring down straight at Kyrah. Her face was expressionless and she tapped her foot, obviously meaning that she wasn’t going to leave without Kyrah by her side.   
“Give me five minutes.” She wrapped the blanket around herself, my heart racing when I thought that she was going to pull it right off my body. I quickly grabbed the edge to keep my rear covered, her eyes flicking to meet mine for a second.   
“No, he said now.” She tapped her foot once more and stopped, her eyes staring unblinkingly down at us.  
“Well obviously I’m not going to go naked, could you step outside at least?”  
The girl scoffed and walked out, tossing her hair over her shoulder, barely remembering to close the door behind her. Kyrah sighed and rubbed a hand over her forehead, gracing me with a sympathetic smile. I knew that she was going to leave, but I wasn’t wanting to let her warmth slip away from me.   
“Don’t go.” I felt her start to shift away from me, the absence of her body making me feel cold. She pressed a kiss to my forehead and I could see the sympathetic half-smile on her face as she walked away from me, covering herself in Thieves Guild armor once more.   
“I have to go.” Her voice was gentle as she pulled her pants back on, hiding the body that I had wanted to spend the rest of the night admiring.   
She let her fingers trail through my hair for a moment before she walked out the door, her stance once again showing that she’s all business. She walked down the stairs and out of my line of sight, leaving me alone in bed with nothing but a few of her stray hairs and the mark in the bed where she had previously rested.   
I closed the door behind her, the blanket wrapped tightly around my waist just in case there was anyone else on the floor. I sat back down on the bed, not bothering to get dressed again, and continuing reading from Fall From Glory.   
I imagined her bringing the Guild back to its former glory and couldn’t help but feel proud at the thought. She joined them as nothing more than a sneaky girl who this Brynjolf wanted to get with, and ended up bringing it back from the dead. I chose to be proud of her for her achievements instead of jealous that she achieved them simply because he thought she was worthy of having sex with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't decided if I want to keep writing on this story or have it come to a close, please let me know if you have any opinions!


	12. Kyrah POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyrah, angry at the interruption, goes to see what Brynjolf wants from her, and is met with some shocking news. 
> 
> I do not own Skyrim, Riften, the Thieves Guild, Vilkas, Brynjolf, or anything other than my original character, all credit goes to Bethesda!

I stomped my way into the Cistern to see him standing there, a smirk prominent on his face. I stormed through the room and over the bridge leading up to him, using all of my will not to smack that smug expression straight off his face.   
“Heard I interrupted something.” His voice was purely a taunt.   
“Yes, you did. Are you ready to go over the numbers, or are you going to stand there with that insufferable grin on your face all day?”   
“Sure, lass. Let’s go.”  
He led the way to the desk that held the ledger, ander at him burning its way through my body. I saw the numbers in front of my eyes as I took a seat, my mind shifting to calculate the numbers as I did every month. My quill scratched over a roll of paper, carefully forming each number to assure that I made no mistakes in my math.   
“We need our Guild Master down here with us, lass.” He paused, his voice suddenly serious. “Not just every few weeks. We need a leader all the time. It would help pick up the morale around here.”  
“Well I can’t be here all the time, Brynjolf, that’s why I employed you to be my second in command while I’m away.” I didn’t break my concentration to look up at him, my mind occupied with the numbers in front of me as well as thoughts of Vilkas waiting for me in bed.   
“I know that you loved me once.” He stated this, catching me off guard. He was never this direct about anything.   
“Once, but no more.” I kept my tone clipped as I double checked my math.   
“Are you sure?” His voice lilted more, likely because he knew how strongly his accent used to affect me. “Not even in the slightest?”  
His hand crept over mine, stopping the flow of numbers that were coming quickly from my quill. His eyes met mine and he smiled, but my skin no longer tingled at his touch. My stomach no longer flipped over itself when he met my gaze and I was still able to think straight despite his closeness.   
“No.” I tore my hand away from his, returning to my work. “As you may have realized, I have a man waiting for me right now that I very much like.” My handwriting reflected my anger, becoming much harsher as I pushed down on the tip of the quill instead of turning and hitting him.   
“If you stay down here to be our Guild Master, I will be with you.” His eyes were boring into the side of my head. “Only you.”  
I looked up at him, a laugh bubbling up under my suppressed smile. I knew that he didn’t want to be a leader, but I never thought that he would try to reduce me to nothing more than a woman who desperately wanted to be married. Since marriages were so scarce I had encountered quite a few women who wanted to be married just to say that they had, but I had never envisioned myself entering the Temple of Mara with Brynjolf, or anyone else for that matter.   
“I am with Vilkas now.” I nodded, deeply emphasizing each of my words to make sure he knew how much I meant them. “I would like to always be with him. I do not love you, and you do not love me.”  
I continued doing both his work and mine as he walked away from me, quieter than I had ever heard him when he wasn’t sneaking through someone else’s house. I ran through the numbers twice more as I usually did, assuring myself that not a single coin had gone missing in my absence.   
“Need to talk?” I heard Rune’s voice and it pulled me out of my thoughts. I rubbed a hand over my forehead and smiled lightly up at him, leaning back in my chair. There he stood with his arms crossed over his chest.   
“You know, the first time you asked me thought, I thought you were being sarcastic. I thought you hated me because I was new.” He looked surprised at this, taking the seat that Brynjolf had previously occupied.   
“No, you looked troubled then just as you do now.” He rested his sword across his lap, making himself comfortable in the seat. “You need something, or you just want to talk?”   
I smiled again, running a hand through my hair. I loosened some of the knots that marred my hair, my armor feeling too tight. I wished that I was back in our room at the Bee and Barb with Vilkas, my mind travelling back to him.   
“Brynjolf keeps telling me that if I’m not here all the time, the Guild is going to go under again.” He interrupted me to scoff at this, rolling his eyes quickly. “What was that about?”  
“The Guild is fine, much better than when Mercer was in charge of us. If you want to go off and be a Companion, that’s fine, he’s just being dramatic.”   
I nodded, pulling one of my legs up to my chest. I felt comfortable down here in the Cistern and often longed to be nothing more than a common thief, but knew that it was no place for the Dragonborn. I could no longer deny the fact that I was the character from all of the Nord legends, and couldn’t spend my whole life in the sewers beneath Riften, coordinating some of the most skilled thieves in the country.   
“I want to come back. I do.” My voice was small, I didn’t want anyone besides Rune to hear the horrible admittance. “But if I do, I know that I would lose Vilkas. Plus,” I paused, his reassuring eyes seeming to pull the truth out of me, “if I really am this Dragonborn person, I have to be more than a thief. I have to be ready for a fight whenever it may come.”  
He bit his lip, taking a moment to absorb the new information. I had only told a handful of people that I could possibly be the Dragonborn, and the only thief to know what Karliah. I knew that Brynjolf wouldn’t understand it and the others didn’t need to know, but Karliah agreed with my decision.   
“You’re doing the right thing, even if it isn’t the thing you want to do.” He smiled at me, and it was almost as if I could feel a weight lift from my shoulders. He always knew what to say to make people feel better. “If a dragon comes down, I know that I wouldn’t be able to take it down. Being a thief isn’t going to help you then, but being a Companion might.”   
I placed my hand over his, remembering why I had for a moment thought that he was the best man in the Guild. He was different from the other thieves because he actually wanted to know what was going on in the head of others. It was almost as if he wanted to hear the stories of others to fill up the place where his own stories should have been.   
“Thank you. I’ve missed you greatly since I’ve been gone.” He chuckled quietly, patting his hand on mine.   
“I’ve missed you too. There’s no one to level out Brynjolf’s perfectionism, we’re all beginning to feel more like employees than brothers and sisters in crime.”   
I glanced around to see him pacing back and forth between the Flagon and the Cistern, a book in hand, his eyes barely looking up enough to keep him from bumping into the various objects and people in his path. His right hand held a quill and he was marking things off, as if he was taking inventory, though I didn’t know what he was checking off.   
“What’s he doing?” I leaned closer to Rune, my eyes still watching Brynjolf as he circled the Cistern.   
“Ah, he keeps track of how much time we all spend here in the Flagon, and compares it to how many jobs each of us take.” He raised his eyebrows, obviously displeased with this new habit. “Then, the person who spends the most time down here has a quota to meet the next month.”  
I stood up, knowing that Brynjolf needed a guiding hand. He had openly admitted that he wasn’t one to be a leader, and was much better when receiving directions that administering them. Walking toward him I could hear that he was muttering to himself, remembering that he was not one for writing.   
“Brynjolf,” I placed a hand on his book to pull his attention away from it. “We need to talk about this little habit of yours.”   
He raised one eyebrow at me, already showing that he was displeased with this conversation as well as me. I knew that he wasn’t going to be apt to listen to me so soon after I had turned down his invitation, but I was still the Guild Master and he knew how to listen to directions.   
“Thieves aren’t meant to be kept track of. You can’t keep track of their comings and goings, or how much money each job is going to bring in. They came to us because they didn’t fit in with the rest of organized society, and you can’t make them feel like you’re keeping track of them all the time, or they’re going to lose their motivation.” I paused, trying to figure out the nicest way to convey this message to him. “You just have to let thieves be thieves.”   
He turned and walked away from me at that, his feet stomping down on each stone that he stepped on. I could see the anger in the way that he carried himself, the straightness of his back and the clenched position of his fists.   
“Brynjolf.”  
He stopped when I said his name, but didn’t turn to look at me once more. I could feel the anger crackling between both of us, hoping that neither of us would get angry enough to explode in front of the people we were supposed to be leading.   
“You come in here, to the place that is supposed to be our home, after leaving to be with him.” He gulped down some air and I knew he was calming as he turned to meet my gaze. “I chose you as our Guild Master because I thought that you were loyal to our Guild. I thought that this was going to be our home, together.” He took a few steps closer to me and I felt my anger dissipate some when I saw the sadness and confusion that were clearly displayed on his face.   
“What? I love the Guild, and I wish I could come back.” I knew that I shouldn’t have said it, but I did. Jorrvaskr, though it was welcoming, would never be home as the Cistern had been. The Cistern was alive with both the thieves that inhabited it and the sounds that the old room made on its own.   
He held my hands in his own, drawing them up to his chest. He met my gaze and his eyes were wide with seriousness, his grip on my hands a little too tight to be comfortable.   
“You were supposed to be our Guild Master. You brought this Guild back to life, and then you just leave? If you had stayed, we could have pushed the hold of the Guild even further throughout all the holds in Skyrim. Lass, if you hadn’t left,” he paused, and I felt nervousness creep under my skin at his quiet tone of voice, “we may have had a chance.”  
I stepped away from him, struggling to pull my hands free from his hold. I had to get distance between us. I couldn’t let him get under my skin again. I couldn’t let him be anything other than my second in command who kept the Guild in line when I was away. He looked up at me, looking more genuine than I had ever seen him, his accent seeming more pronounced due to how quiet he was speaking.  
“I could have actually loved you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaahh, Brynjolf feels are altering my story! What do I do?!


	13. Vilkas POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas finds a solution to their problem and is relieved when his main issue is resolved

“Vilkas.”  
Her voice drew my attention up from my book, almost making me jump from her sudden entrance into the room. She fell on top of me and her mouth crushed against mine, her fingers twisting into my hair. I let the book fall onto the bed beside me, glad that I only put my smallclothes on when she left the room.   
Her mouth was urgent on mine and her hips pressed on mine through the blankets, her hold on my hair keeping my face to hers. I felt her waist under my hands as she pressed herself close to me, her armor cold and slick from the rain outside. I felt a wetness against my cheek and pulled back, despite her attempts to keep me from breaking the kiss. Her lips brush down my throat and I shiver, but then I saw that the wetness I had felt was her tears.   
“Kyrah,” I grab her upper arms, worry replacing all of the arousal that had quickly spread through me, “what is it? What’s wrong?”  
“I don’t know what to do, Vilkas.” She sobbed out my name, her hands covering her face as the tears flowed more freely. “I miss it here, I really do, but I know that you hate it here. I miss the Cistern. I miss this city. I miss the rain and the fog and even the smell of the fresh fish.” The sobs racked her body and I stood up, quickly rushing to shut the door to preserve her privacy. I knew that there were other people staying in the Bee and Barb and didn’t want her to feel embarrassed.   
“Oh gods I hate myself.” She fell onto the bed, her legs tucking up against her body and she sniffled harshly through the tears. “I miss it so much but I know you would hate it here. You’re the opposite of a thief, maybe you would be better off away from me.”   
My heart dropped, but I knew that if I broke down too it would only make her worse. I sat beside her, running my fingers slowly from her scalp to the end of her dark hair. I had to hold it back, not letting her know just how much those words wounded me.   
“I love you.” I stated this, my fingers drifting across her forehead lightly. “And I know that you love me too, right?” She nodded, resolved to nothing more than sniffling. “And I also know that Jorrvaskr will never be your home, just as Riften will never be mine.”   
Her sobs became harsher again, and I wasn’t sure what I was going to say next. What if she didn’t think that I was worth moving for? What if she chose the Thieves Guild over me? I wouldn’t put it past her, and I knew just how much Riften meant to her. But I also knew that I wasn’t willing to give up on her that easily. What was I going to say? My mind flashed, searching for the most appropriate thing to say.   
“What if, we find our own home?” It was as if my mouth thought of the solution on its own, my mind lagging behind. “I don’t have to live in Jorrvaskr to be a Companion, and you don’t have to live in the Cistern to be a proper Guild Master.” I tugged my fingers through a tangle in the end of her hair, letting the soft darkness fall across my thigh. I felt her head rest on my leg but didn’t pry to see her face, knowing that it would only make her feel worse about her swollen eyes and drippy nose. She never believed that I would still love her, despite seeing her cry.   
“Where?” She sniffed, her voice scratchy from the crying. She wiped furiously at her face and her skin deepened in color from the rough fabric of her sleeve.   
“There’s plenty of homes for sale around Whiterun, we could find one that’s as close to the middle between the two cities as we can get.” She glanced up at me past her sleeve that still covered her mouth, her eyes hopeful through the threat of tears. “That way, I can still be active in the Companions, and you can spend more time with the Guild. I know that it’s not living down there with the rest of them, but it’s not Whiterun.”  
She seemed to roll the idea around in her head, obviously looking for any flaws in the plan. Her eyes were looking at me but I knew that her mind was somewhere else, walking through all of the steps to my plan, looking for any reason that it wouldn’t work. Finally she nodded, a small smile creeping onto her face and she sniffed her nose.   
“You’ve never lived anywhere besides Jorrvaskr, though.” Her body curled closer to mine, one of her hands finding mine.   
“It’s worth it.” I kissed her forehead, knowing that it was okay to touch her once she wasn’t actively crying. “I would rather live with you in a place where we are both happy, than one of us being uncomfortable.” She smiled, her head turning to rest on my hand, stopping my fingers from running through her hair any more.   
“I’d like that.” She paused to press a small kiss to my palm. “I think I’d like to live somewhere that’s just ours.”   
My chest felt lighter, glad that my mouth could work faster than my mind sometimes. I could already imagine her walking through a house that was just ours, finally free from having to put on all of her armor just to walk out of the bedroom. We would finally have a bed that was big enough for both of us, instead of one that was meant for just one person.   
“Maybe we can have a big bed, so you won’t punch and kick me all night.” I smiled, seeing her laugh at that. It was true, she did toss and turn quite a bit in her sleep, and often her hands rested in fists, resulting in many bruises and black eyes for me.   
“You’d really be okay with moving away from Jorrvaskr?” I nodded, knowing that I would be okay. “What about Farkas?”  
I hadn’t thought about him. We had never lived that far away from one another, the farthest being across a hallway. I couldn’t imagine waking up and walking out of my room without knowing that he was just a couple of feet away from me, and my happiness was dampened some at the thought.   
“I guess he’ll take me moving away pretty rough, but I think he’ll be okay.” I bit my lip, already nervous about the thought of telling him that we would be separated. He had been close to me for my entire life, and I couldn’t imagine my life without him by my side. He had always been there, the brawn to my brains, both of us more recognizable together than by ourselves. Without him I was viewed as nothing more than a Companion, but with him we were Vilkas and Farkas.   
“No,” she laughed as if she knew something that I didn’t, souring my mood even further, “I mean, how will Farkas do with moving away from Jorrvaskr? I wouldn’t ask you to be away from your brother.”   
My heart felt like it was soaring. I couldn’t believe that she was actually proposing that my brother come with us, and I was even more bothered by the fact that I hadn’t seen it coming. Maybe love had made me blind to reason, but I didn’t care. I was willing to give up some common sense to be able to see her so clearly.   
“Really?” She nodded, sitting up, her head resting on my shoulder.   
“Of course, I don’t think you’d be able to do it if you had to be away from Farkas.” She ran a hand through my hair, kissing my cheek.   
I felt so calm then, knowing that this was what I had been waiting for my whole life. I had been with few women in my time, but knew that she was going to be the last women in my history. She was going to be the last person to capture my heart in that way, and she was going to become the only woman that I was with. I closed my eyes and concentrated on the feeling of her body on mine, knowing that I would fight to keep it close to me for the rest of our lives.   
“I love you.” I wrapped my arms around her, promising myself silently that I was never going to let her go again. I wanted to keep her with me at all times, hoping that she would agree to someday make it official. I had never envisioned myself getting married to anyone, always thinking that I would spend my days focusing on nothing but being a Companion, the only person in my life that made me feel better being Farkas. But she had surpassed my own expectations for my life, making me realize that every time I had envisioned my future, I was thinking pessimistically. I should have known that I would meet someone like her.   
“I love you too.”   
Her words were everything that I needed to hear and more, reassuring me that she did in fact love me. I wanted to stay by her side, not caring that she was the Guild Master to a bunch of people that were adamantly against most of the same values of the Companions to which I had devoted my life. I didn’t care that she had climbed the ladder of criminal activity, quickly displaying great skills in the area. I didn’t care that she was even a different race than me. I didn’t care about anything other than keeping the few people that I loved close to me, vowing to do anything to keep them with me.   
Her words grounded me as well as made my heart fly. Her kisses on my hand made me feel like a completely different person than who I had been over a year ago. She had quelled my pessimism and given me someone to love, finally freeing me from the cage of loneliness that I had previously thought I had been condemned to. She was everything good about my life and I was willing to give up Jorrvaskr to keep her.


	14. Farkas POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One year after deciding to move from Jorrvaskr, Farkas notices and reflects on the changes in his brother.
> 
>  
> 
> I do not own Skyrim, Farkas, Vilkas, Whiterun, the Companions, or anything other than my original character, all credit goes to Bethesda

**One Year Later**

* * *

opened my eyes to see the framed photo of my brother and I on the bedside table, his usually sour face still not perfectly happy in the picture. I knew that even though he was happy, he would still be a moody man, smiling at the idea that he was once so angry all the time. I rolled over and felt the blankets wrapping around me, feeling so at peace in my home.  
When Vilkas told me that he was moving away from Jorrvaskr, I thought that it was the closest I would come to having my heart broken. I couldn’t imagine being away from my brother, my best friend, the only person I had ever been really close to. I had thought that he was leaving me, abandoning me to be nothing more than a Companion, no longer his brother.  
But when he told me that I was coming home with him, I almost didn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe that even though his life was moving on, he wasn’t going to just leave me behind. I had seen the changes in his face, even though he never thought that anyone would. I could see the way that his eyes no longer looked dulled by the constant undercurrent of anger in his demeanor, nor was his mouth pinched shut, always threatening to toss an insult to anyone who spoke with him.  
I stood, quietly making my way to the restroom. I knew that they weren’t awake yet and I had to keep quiet. No matter how much Kyrah showed me how to tiptoe through the hallway without making a sound, I would never catch on completely. I hoped that I wasn’t making enough noise to wake them up, but I wasn’t willing to wait in bed all morning for them to get up.  
Walking past their bedroom I saw that their bedroom door was open, smiling. I could see the smile on his face, one more genuine than I had ever seen in our lives. I saw his arms wrapping around her, his face smooth from the worry lines that had long resided there. He pressed kisses to her skin and I continued down the hallway, hearing her laugh and insist that she needed to get ready.  
I had never seen my brother happy for so long. I remembered seeing him with other girls, but his pessimism always crept through, worming its way into his relationships. The last girl had been a Companion, and one day she had left on a job, never to return. I remembered how far he had spiralled into his anger after that, and I had wondered if he would ever be pulled back out of it.  
I heard their door open and pulled my pants back up around my body, glancing around to see if I would be able to make it back to my room without interrupting their morning. I saw her in her full armor, pulling her hair up, but I didn’t look at her. All that I saw was the way that Vilkas was looking at her.  
I had seen him when he thought that he was in love, and I had seen him when he actually believed that he loved them, but I had never seen him look like this. I had never seen him look at another person the way that he was looking at her, as if he had never been angry in his life. His smile was so easy and he looked more relaxed than I had ever seen him. His muscles were no longer constantly taunt with the threat of exploding from anger and he looked genuinely happy.  
I entered the hallway, seeing that she was trying to get an early start on the day, but was about to give in to his arms around her waist. I slipped behind him, quickly making my way to my own room, laughing under my breath.  
“What are you laughing at?” I heard his voice carry down the hallway toward me, knowing that he was once again paying attention to me.  
“Nothing, just wondering what happened to my brother.” I looked at him, barely recognizing the person in front of me, but knowing that he had changed for the better. His face still held the traces of his earlier smile and he looked like a different person still. It had been so long since I had seen him look happy, for a long time I didn’t believe that he’d be happy again after the last women never returned to him.  
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I saw her untangle herself from his hold as he said this, taking the opportunity to finish getting ready. I knew that he wasn’t going to Jorrvaskr today, shown through the fact that he still wasn’t dressed at all.  
“My brother has always been angry and insulting. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you smile this much, Vilkas.” I nodded at him, feeling satisfied with how I explained it. “I like that you’re happy, I do.”  
He smiled and I saw her kiss the side of his face, anticipating the protests that he would use in attempt to keep her with him. I closed the door behind me, knowing that they wanted to be alone, but not before I heard him tell her that he loved her.  
I had heard him say that only a few times before to women, and knew that it was far different from the way he said it to her. He said it as if he meant it with every fiber of his being, as if everything else paled in comparison to his love for her. I knew that I might not ever find that, but it was okay. I didn’t need a significant other as much as I needed my brother. He was the person that made me feel safe and okay, and I never thought that a woman would be able to take his place as the person I cared for the most.  
I knew that he was happy, and that was all that mattered to me. He had never been really happy before, and I had seen it grow from occasional fits to a constant unpleasantness through our time at Jorrvaskr, something that I never thought he was going to grow out of. But when I saw him smile, I knew that it was something that wasn’t going to end. He was going to be happy and I was happy for that, knowing that I wasn’t going to have to give up my brother for him to be happy with her.  
“Come back soon.”  
His voice crept into my room and I buckled on the remaining pieces of my armor, intending to make it back to Jorrvaskr while the sun was still high enough for me to see. The days were growing shorter and the air was crisper, and I was hoping to make it back to Whiterun without catching a cold. I opened the door and saw him kissing her fingers, raising a brow and smirking silently.  
He always had to be so in control that it was odd to see him staying home while she left. He had always had a sense of dominance about him, never letting someone else be right, always demanding to be the leader on every excursion. It made me laugh to see him being so gentle with her, acting as if she was delicate, despite the fact that he was the man who had on more than one occasion insisted that although he was smaller, he was still stronger than me.  
He was the man who had insisted that she was nothing more than a whelp in his mind, but I knew that it was different from the very beginning. I had seen for uncomfortable he was around her, and her arrival marked the first time that he had ever asked me for help with women. I had seen how his face blushed and his voice lost its usual roughness, and after seeing him talk to her, I knew that it was gone for good.  
His voice no longer held the insulting edge that it once had, always reminding me that he could make anyone else feel inferior whenever he chose. His brows no longer knitted together as if he was constantly contemplating every detail of life, now his face relaxed as if the only thing that mattered was already with him in the house.  
I saw her walk away, and I could see it in his eyes. It was something that I had seen when I had helped him talk to her, and when I had seen him fail the first few times. I had seen it when he jumped at the chance to accompany her on her Trail, though she ended up going with me. I had even seen it before he knew what was going on, but I would never tell him that. I didn’t want him to think that I knew something that he didn’t and risk turning him back into that angry man that thought he had to know everything, I wanted to leave him as a nerd in love.  
I saw him look after her as if she was the only thing that she saw, but I didn’t feel jealous. I had never felt the need to settle down with just one woman, but I knew that it was right for him. He had already lost too many people, I knew that he wouldn’t be able to handle a life without commitment. He was in love and I had seen it in his eyes for years, and I knew that I would always see it. He was in love for good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved doing this pairing so much, I will most likely do another story with them. Thank you for those who read this and supported me, it was amazing!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to anyone who read this, it means a lot to me. I do not know exactly how this is going to end, so if you have a preference Brynjolf vs. Vilkas, please let me know!


End file.
